Skin Horse

By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
Color by Pancha Diaz
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2022-04-05
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2022-04-05

by shaenon on April 5, 2022 at 12:01 am
Chapter: Phantomwise
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Discussion (44) ¬

  1. thejoemoose
    April 5, 2022, 12:31 am | # | Reply

    Wait.

    What?

    • Gfrogs
      April 5, 2022, 12:51 am | # | Reply

      NICK – GIN? LET’S GET HITCHED NOW. BEFORE HALF OUR FRIENDS GO.
      GINNY – YOU WANT TO?
      NACK – YEAH! WHERE’S OUR OFFICIANT?
      GIN – TURNED OUT TO BE A BIOMASS PLANT. HE’S ESCAPING INTO SPACE.
      OFFICIPLANT – SO LONG, SUCKERS! (FLIPS BIRDS)
      NICHOLAS – CRAP I GOTTA CATCH UP ON GROUP CHAT.
      RYE GIN – WE’LL NEVER GET OUR DEPOSITS BACK.

      • awgiedawgie
        April 5, 2022, 12:53 am | # | Reply

        Wait.

        What?

  2. Towering Barbarian
    April 5, 2022, 12:36 am | # | Reply

    Shouldn’t be that hard to replace him. Just find some Cthulhlu Cultists and get one of the to hold the ceremony. And if push came to shove handfasting would also be an option. 🙂

    • Towering Barbarian
      April 5, 2022, 12:40 am | # | Reply

      sigh. “Get one of the” should “get one of them”. Wish I could blame this one on spellchecker but in this case the mistake was purely mine. >_<

    • awgiedawgie
      April 5, 2022, 12:51 am | # | Reply

      Except for the sticky detail that Nick is a rather devout Jew. They need a Rabbi.

      • Psycho Snail
        April 5, 2022, 1:31 am | # | Reply

        He cant bee too devout, given the amount of fornication he engaged in

        • Ray Radlein
          April 5, 2022, 2:12 am | # | Reply

          No, no, formication is ants, not bees

      • 5-tons-of-flax
        April 5, 2022, 7:47 am | # | Reply

        In this crowd it might be easier to find a rabbit.

        • Shadowmehr
          April 5, 2022, 1:01 pm | # | Reply

          In this crowd, the rabbit could still be a rabbi.

      • skullthetroll
        April 5, 2022, 10:01 am | # | Reply

        Apparently they agreed on an Officiant. Nicks got devout beliefs for himself but he doesn’t push them on others. He also doesn’t let other peoples rules constrain him if he doesn’t want to.

      • Robert Nowall
        April 5, 2022, 3:28 pm | # | Reply

        According to the Wikipedia article on Jewish weddings, the wedding can be presided over by a huzzah, a cantor, as well, somebody to call up people to recite the seven blessings.

        I’ll recommend the article to everybody. So many questions. Has the ketubah been prepared? Did Nick ever get the chuppah? Do they have the rings? Who’ll be escorting the bride and the groom?

        Actually, if I’m going to recommend the article, I should provide a link. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_wedding

    • Aname
      April 5, 2022, 7:21 am | # | Reply

      I’ve always been partial to “Jumping the Besom”, so that’s another option.
      Or they can just move to Australia and after a while they can claim a de facto relationship.

      • =Tamar
        April 5, 2022, 7:32 am | # | Reply

        If they would accept the Australian method, they could just go to Philadelphia and say they are married in front of witnesses. That’s all it takes, because of old Quaker laws.

        • Sheik
          April 5, 2022, 10:10 am | # | Reply

          Not just Quaker law.
          Several US States have Common Law Statutes.

      • Daibhid C
        April 5, 2022, 1:13 pm | # | Reply

        Or the British military custom of “Leaping the Sword”, which has an … interesting form of words (also seen in I Shall Wear Midnight). If Valiant was still around, I’m sure he’d be delighted to loan his sword for the occasion.

  3. Candace
    April 5, 2022, 1:06 am | # | Reply

    Oops.

  4. Frank Hightower
    April 5, 2022, 2:04 am | # | Reply

    Pavane, you’re taking the Biomass? Respectfully, this is a bad idea

  5. Kyle
    April 5, 2022, 2:05 am | # | Reply

    Skin Horse often makes me smile, but this one got a full-belly laugh.

    My personal MVP: Gin’s left eyebrow. Did a lot of work in this one. Second place goes to the double guns / VWOOP tag-team.

    • Candace
      April 6, 2022, 1:32 am | # | Reply

      I did enjoy the left eyebrow, also. Actually, Virginia’s got a cute little half-smile in the first panel, too. Really, this whole strip is very well-put-together, and the art and dialog perfectly complement each other.

  6. woozy
    April 5, 2022, 2:35 am | # | Reply

    Meanwhile….? At Chris’ and Marcie’s motel room …..?

    • Candace
      April 6, 2022, 1:33 am | # | Reply

      IKR?! The authors are keeping us in suspense about where that other shoe landed!

  7. Foradain
    April 5, 2022, 3:02 am | # | Reply

    So, it turns out the rabbi was a plant…

    An enemy agent?

    No, a vegetable life form. Well, an enemy agent, also.

  8. Jay
    April 5, 2022, 4:31 am | # | Reply

    “So a bishop, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a Biomass trap and get assimilated… and you’ll have to come up with your own punchline; see ya, puny earthlings!”

  9. OneUniverse
    April 5, 2022, 4:43 am | # | Reply

    So Unity uses her Notary powers to make it official, and we find out one of the Silverfish is a Rabbi.

    • nebulousrikulau
      April 5, 2022, 12:22 pm | # | Reply

      I was going to Suggest that, but apparently the only states that allow a Notary to officiate a marriage are Florida, Maine, and South Carolina.

      • OneUniverse
        April 5, 2022, 1:05 pm | # | Reply

        Well, phooey.

  10. David B Huber
    April 5, 2022, 6:42 am | # | Reply

    Panel 1 is an instant classic – Dr. Lee is just adorable! And dear Mustachio with Hitty in the background look as happy and satisfied as can be.

    Happiness is a perfect partner.

    • M
      April 5, 2022, 3:46 pm | # | Reply

      It’s only a few lines, but Shaenon has perfectly captured that adoring look.

      And how she captured Mustachio’s expression like that in even fewer tiny lines, I really don’t know.

  11. Robert Nowall
    April 5, 2022, 7:00 am | # | Reply

    I take it Gary was Reform?

    • awgiedawgie
      April 5, 2022, 8:16 am | # | Reply

      Slightly deformed, perhaps.

  12. jdreyfuss
    April 5, 2022, 8:10 am | # | Reply

    Tip is technically the head of some kind of government. Doesn’t he have the power to marry them?

    • awgiedawgie
      April 5, 2022, 8:31 am | # | Reply

      Tip is at the top tier of the shadow government. That’s not the same as government. So while it gives him plenty of power, it doesn’t give him any real legal authority.

      And regardless of that, even being the head of the actual government doesn’t automatically allow one to perform marriages. You have to be a judge or justice of the peace, a clerk of the court, or an ordained minister. (Some states have other possibilities – for example, in California, anyone can apply to be a Deputy Commissioner of Marriages, which is valid for one day only – but they’re in Kansas, and Kansas requires the minister to be ordained.)

      Of course, if Nick would allow the ceremony to be performed by someone other than a Rabbi, Artie could do it, since he actually is an ordained minister.

      • mickeyjf
        April 5, 2022, 10:54 am | # | Reply

        Or the Captain of a ship at sea. Bubbles?

        • Aname
          April 5, 2022, 1:03 pm | # | Reply

          Yes, I like that.

          (Turns to Nick) Service is my only joy?
          (Nick) I do.
          (Turns to Ginny) Service is my only joy?
          (Ginny) I do.
          (Turns to crowd) Service Is My Only Joy!
          (Crowd) Cheers, throws rice.

          • OneUniverse
            April 5, 2022, 1:07 pm | #

            Not?

          • Robert Nowall
            April 5, 2022, 2:52 pm | #

            Last seen as captain of a ship at sky: the U. S. S. Constitution.

          • jdreyfuss
            April 6, 2022, 1:31 pm | #

            JOY!

  13. Marie
    April 5, 2022, 11:06 am | # | Reply

    Anyone else remembered that Artie is an ordained minister? http://narbonic.com/comic/june-18-23-2001/

    • Robert Nowall
      April 5, 2022, 11:32 am | # | Reply

      Yup. Saves me from mentioning it. Artie saved up his boxtops and became a Unitarian minister. He officiated at Dave’s funeral and Dave-and-Helen’s wedding (in that order). But that would work only for a civil marriage…for the Jewish Nick, he’d have to insist on a rabbi. Dunno about Dr. Lee.

      Nick’s blog mentions two rabbis. One, who’s in with the Shadow Government (forget just how, if Nick said): he installed the mezzuzah on Nick’s helicopter. (Would’a thought Nick would approach him first, but there might be some other reason.)

      The other rabbi mentioned was Nick’s old rabbi from Philadelphia. I said once before, that he might have some qualms about presiding over Nick’s wedding because he presided over Nick’s funeral. (Not as enlightened as Artie, I suppose.)

      (Did think this Gary, er, guy, was just the wedding planner, not the rabbi.)

      • Daibhid C
        April 5, 2022, 2:01 pm | # | Reply

        Regarding Dr Lee, I did some cursory research, and as far as I can make out, a traditional Korean wedding isn’t a religious ceremony and while the officiant can be a religious figure if the couple want, the only requirement is being a respected person, and it’s not actually necessary for there to be one at all. So, unless she has some religious beliefs that haven’t come up before, she’d probably be fine with a Unitarian minister, or a rabbi, or literally anyone, really.

        But suppose, just for the sake of argument, that she’s a member of, oh, let’s say the Presbyterian Church of Korea. Does this mean they’d need a rabbi who was also a PCK minister, somehow?

    • awgiedawgie
      April 5, 2022, 4:48 pm | # | Reply

      Yeah, I mentioned it briefly above, but it was at the tail end of my whole comment, so it was easy to miss.

  14. Robert Nowall
    April 5, 2022, 2:55 pm | # | Reply

    Nick and Gin find it’s time to get hitched. Their officiant, they, he has ditched. There’s no ceremony, he’s a Biomass phony. Only these words: son-of-a-bitch!

    • Candace
      April 6, 2022, 1:37 am | # | Reply

      This one gave me a chuckle.

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