To the tune of about 5000 different songs, but the most widely recognized may be “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” (or in this group, “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Bat”):
Sweetheart and her citizen
Want to get the files again.
From the basement they will climb,
Get them back in record time.
Sweetheart and her citizen
(Also goes by Tip Wilkin.)
Sweetheart’s alliance is great,
Something something something “ate”.
O-blig-‘tor-y second verse.
With the messed-up lyrics curse.
Something something little star.
Now I know my ABCs.
Sounds like one of ‘Yes Minister’s’ irregular verbs.
“I have an independent mind; you are an eccentric; he is round the twist.”
“I give confidential press briefings; you leak; he’s being charged under section 2A of the Official Secrets Act.”
But wait! Sweetheart using the files first actually made sense, since then everyone would have access to them at the same time. That part’s not Mad. Expecting Tip to sing an anthem, though, is a sure sign that her mind is going.
That would make sense if that was her rationale. It doesn’t look like she’s thinking about anything except getting that raise ASAP, though. In any case, the reason why I said it looks like she’s going mad is today’s (and maybe yesterday’s) strip.
Oh say can you see, front desk backstabbed me!
Files so proudly expropr’ated from Kip they’ve kept for themselves?
Whose stacks of sheets and cover pages thru the perilous fight,
O’er Mustachio’s sound weapon they soundly knocked us out.
And who’s reports should they be? Whose else’s but me?
From far and wide,
O basement files, we stand on guard for thee.
Kip help keep our files glorious and free!
O paperwork, we stand on guard for thee.
O paperwork, we stand on guard for thee.
So what is this now, the Back Office Revolutionary Front, fighting a war of national liberation? Hmmm.
“Oh, say can you see, by the florescent light
What so proudly we hailed in our tiny back office?
Whose insectile small print and check boxes so tight
Shine forth through the rings of a million spilled coffees?
And the musak’s brown noise, all the front desk’s crude toys
Could barely distract us from paperwork’s joys.
Oh, say does that triplicate tax form still wave
O’er the desk of the free and the team of the brave?”
Actually, Ed, a filk of a Channing song in a Channing strip seems most appropriate:
(TUNE: “The Official Madblood Battle Anthem”, Jeffrey Channing Wells)
From the West to the East
From the greatest to the least
Ev’ry creature, ‘bot and beast,
Bow before her!
All departments, all floors
From the windows to the doors
You must crawl upon all fours
And implore her:
“O my liege! Here you go!
Take my files! Sieze control!
We are beaten – BY YOUR FAITHFUL SCANNER CORPS!”
(chorus)
Hail to the Captain of Industry!
Loudly our voices in harmony
Sing out the verse that she wrote, with glee –
The mighty Lead Dog Sweetheart!
From the West to the East
Basement’s depth to rooftop’s crest
You’ll be sorry that you ever messed
With Sweetheart!
Agent horde at her hest
Steely heart within her breast
There are medals on the furry rest
Of Sweetheart!
We, who heed her demands
Live to follow her commands;
Three are three:
SCAN! REFILE! And scan SOME MORE!
SCAN SOME MORE!
SCANNER CORPS!
SCANNER CORPS!
(chorus)
Hail to the leader in copying!
Loudly our underpaid voices ring!
Great is the triumph that we will bring
To mighty Lead Dog Sweetheart!
So does Sweetheart consider them to be the Judean People’s Front, the Popular Front of Judea, the People’s Front of Judea, or the Judean Popular Front?
Hrm, Sweetheart seems to be branching into politics. Add that to her bureaucratic skills, mix in some lying and she’ll be able to run against H.T. in whatever political endeavor he’s pursuing.
“A rebellion is always legal in the first person, such as ‘our rebellion.’ It is only in the third person – ‘their rebellion’ – that it becomes illegal. ”
Come on, filkers, we want to hear the anthem!
(I wish I could write filks.)
Her anthem goes:
Bark bark woof yip ruff ruff bark!
Ruff ruff ruff ruff woof bark bark!
Bark bark woof woof ruff bark woof!
Yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip!
*Short howl.*
*Long howl.*
Like button, like button… where’s the friggin’ like button?!
Anyway, I like it!
l..I read that to the tune of “Twinkle twinkle little star”
To the tune of about 5000 different songs, but the most widely recognized may be “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” (or in this group, “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Bat”):
Sweetheart and her citizen
Want to get the files again.
From the basement they will climb,
Get them back in record time.
Sweetheart and her citizen
(Also goes by Tip Wilkin.)
Sweetheart’s alliance is great,
Something something something “ate”.
O-blig-‘tor-y second verse.
With the messed-up lyrics curse.
Something something little star.
Now I know my ABCs.
Sounds like one of ‘Yes Minister’s’ irregular verbs.
“I have an independent mind; you are an eccentric; he is round the twist.”
“I give confidential press briefings; you leak; he’s being charged under section 2A of the Official Secrets Act.”
“From the West to the East,
From the greatest to the least …”
No, wait, that’s been taken already. How ’bout this one?
(TUNE: “God Save The Queen”)
Front Desk Resistance rules!
We will show all those fools!
Front Desk we hail!
Bubbles and Chris I bossed,
Then I got double-crossed!
Now base-ment files are lost …
Let’s kick some tail!
Disappointed you didn’t filk the Canadian anthem, one of the best anthems out there. Still, pretty good choice as anthems go.
If you insist…
O, basement files,
That are so close at hand,
I’ll get them soon, if Tip follows commands!
The front desk team betrayed my trust,
But soon they’re going to see,
Through Annex One,
O, basement files, you have to go to me!
Gavotte knows my task,
Is top priority,
O, basement files, you have to go to me!
O, basement files, you have to go to me!
wasn’t “God save the queen” the official anthem until, like, 1980? (Not that it stopped people from singing “O Canada” anyway)
Did somebody say Anthem?
KILL! DESTROY! And kill SOME MORE!
KILL SOME MORE!
DOGS OF WAR!
DOGS OF WAR!
And now thanks to Ed and you I’ll have that stuck in my head all day. Not that I’m complaining.
Let Sweetheart sing her anthem. Find out whether her bark is worse than her bite.
Looks to me like Sweetheart is going mad, and not the genius kind…
Sweetheart’s channeling Hobbes! <3
But wait! Sweetheart using the files first actually made sense, since then everyone would have access to them at the same time. That part’s not Mad. Expecting Tip to sing an anthem, though, is a sure sign that her mind is going.
If you want it to make sense, they should get three or four more scanners, and have everybody scanning a portion of the files.
However, this is a government agency. Things don’t always make sense…
That would make sense if that was her rationale. It doesn’t look like she’s thinking about anything except getting that raise ASAP, though. In any case, the reason why I said it looks like she’s going mad is today’s (and maybe yesterday’s) strip.
Oh say can you see, front desk backstabbed me!
Files so proudly expropr’ated from Kip they’ve kept for themselves?
Whose stacks of sheets and cover pages thru the perilous fight,
O’er Mustachio’s sound weapon they soundly knocked us out.
And who’s reports should they be? Whose else’s but me?
From far and wide,
O basement files, we stand on guard for thee.
Kip help keep our files glorious and free!
O paperwork, we stand on guard for thee.
O paperwork, we stand on guard for thee.
So what is this now, the Back Office Revolutionary Front, fighting a war of national liberation? Hmmm.
“Oh, say can you see, by the florescent light
What so proudly we hailed in our tiny back office?
Whose insectile small print and check boxes so tight
Shine forth through the rings of a million spilled coffees?
And the musak’s brown noise, all the front desk’s crude toys
Could barely distract us from paperwork’s joys.
Oh, say does that triplicate tax form still wave
O’er the desk of the free and the team of the brave?”
Actually, Ed, a filk of a Channing song in a Channing strip seems most appropriate:
(TUNE: “The Official Madblood Battle Anthem”, Jeffrey Channing Wells)
From the West to the East
From the greatest to the least
Ev’ry creature, ‘bot and beast,
Bow before her!
All departments, all floors
From the windows to the doors
You must crawl upon all fours
And implore her:
“O my liege! Here you go!
Take my files! Sieze control!
We are beaten – BY YOUR FAITHFUL SCANNER CORPS!”
(chorus)
Hail to the Captain of Industry!
Loudly our voices in harmony
Sing out the verse that she wrote, with glee –
The mighty Lead Dog Sweetheart!
From the West to the East
Basement’s depth to rooftop’s crest
You’ll be sorry that you ever messed
With Sweetheart!
Agent horde at her hest
Steely heart within her breast
There are medals on the furry rest
Of Sweetheart!
We, who heed her demands
Live to follow her commands;
Three are three:
SCAN! REFILE! And scan SOME MORE!
SCAN SOME MORE!
SCANNER CORPS!
SCANNER CORPS!
(chorus)
Hail to the leader in copying!
Loudly our underpaid voices ring!
Great is the triumph that we will bring
To mighty Lead Dog Sweetheart!
“THERE are three”… hmmph
Wow, Tetra. I … I think I have to just go to bed now. Nothing else that can possibly happen today is going to top that filk.
Is Sweetie really letting her jealousy get to her? Bad puppy! Bad mad puppy! No kibbles for you!
So does Sweetheart consider them to be the Judean People’s Front, the Popular Front of Judea, the People’s Front of Judea, or the Judean Popular Front?
Can’t be the People’s Front of Judea, they don’t know their latin tenses.
Would it be cynical of me to say that Tip and Sweetheart have encapsulated the essence of human mindset in panel 3?
Hrm, Sweetheart seems to be branching into politics. Add that to her bureaucratic skills, mix in some lying and she’ll be able to run against H.T. in whatever political endeavor he’s pursuing.
Fancy for president! The only president guaranteed to be a Sweatheart!
“A rebellion is always legal in the first person, such as ‘our rebellion.’ It is only in the third person – ‘their rebellion’ – that it becomes illegal. ”
Ben Franklin, 1776 (the play, not the year)
Sweetheart, your Canadian Invasion Conditioning is showing.