Skin Horse

By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
Color by Pancha Diaz
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2017-04-18
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2017-04-18

by shaenon on April 18, 2017 at 12:01 am
Chapter: Fun for Some
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Discussion (71) ¬

  1. Chris Barts
    April 18, 2017, 12:08 am | # | Reply

    Unless the sphinx can answer “that’s a paradox” or similar, this is going to be over very quickly.

    • Clifton
      April 18, 2017, 1:06 am | # | Reply

      No, it’s only a single doc.

      (Badum-tish!)

  2. Towering Barbarian
    April 18, 2017, 12:23 am | # | Reply

    I think Baron is up against the same thing Bilbo might have been up against in “The Hobbit when” Tolkien noted that “What is in my pocket?” was merely a question and not a riddle and that Gollum would have been within his rights to reject it as such. Good thing Gollum fumbled an easy Int roll in the heat of the moment. I wonder if the Sphinx is as likely to do the same thing? o_O

    • Ogden Wernstrom
      April 18, 2017, 12:36 am | # | Reply

      Yeah, somebody who reveres riddles would wish Frodo fell in the volcano instead of Gollum.

    • Bruceski
      April 18, 2017, 12:43 am | # | Reply

      I’d call that Tolkein story the first run-in with a pedantic fanbase, but when Homer was telling the Iliad some nasally guy probably stood up and pointed out Hector was using the wrong spear or something.

      • Smithnik
        April 18, 2017, 12:18 pm | # | Reply

        Well, no, but those “topless towers of Illium” clearly had tops, and the ship designs were all wrong…

        • pharmakeusubik
          April 18, 2017, 10:02 pm | # | Reply

          The topless towers were a well known tourist destination. The also filled with water during the rainy season.

        • luciferlordofpride
          April 18, 2017, 11:50 pm | # | Reply

          So far as I can tell, the ‘topless’ trait of the towers of Ilium originated with Christopher Marlowe

          • bitflipper
            September 12, 2017, 10:08 pm | #

            All this time, I thought they were supposed to be “topple-less” and that some transcriber simply had bad spelling.

        • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
          April 19, 2017, 1:27 am | # | Reply

          “Headless Body Found in Topless Towers“?

    • greenknight32
      April 18, 2017, 8:58 am | # | Reply

      Since Bilbo had the ring, the riddle contest didn’t matter, though he didn’t know that. Gollum tried to attack him anyway, but the ring saved him – it wanted to go with Bilbo and get back into the world.

      • DarkStarling
        April 18, 2017, 4:53 pm | # | Reply

        More to the point, the question wouldn’t have counted…until Gollum accepted it, at which point fate started stepping in.

        • woozy
          April 18, 2017, 8:59 pm | # | Reply

          Yeah, but that’s not a plot hole. Gollum did say it wasn’t fair and Bilbo basically did a “is so”. Gollum was right and Bilbo was wrong but … that doesn’t mean it *didn’t* happen. Just that it *shouldn’t* have happened. … if by “should” you mean playing by the rules should have happened…

          • bitflipper
            September 12, 2017, 10:12 pm | #

            That’s the thing, though; thieves are hired by adventurers specifically so that somebody doesn’t have to play by the rules.

  3. Ogden Wernstrom
    April 18, 2017, 12:34 am | # | Reply

    I can’t believe there’s a better question, or general kind of question, than the one I’m thinking of. Actually I’m kind of surprised this scenario isn’t a chestnut I’m familiar with. And we’re all going to be nice and not say it, aren’t we? Yes we are. Though I still expect to be wrong because Shaenon and Jeff came up with something funnier.

    • Ogden Wernstrom
      April 18, 2017, 4:36 pm | # | Reply

      First word is the only w-word that starts with H.

      • John Campbell
        April 18, 2017, 9:03 pm | # | Reply

        Hwæt?

  4. Bruce A Munro
    April 18, 2017, 12:46 am | # | Reply

    Is anyone else reminded of “The Neverending Story?”

  5. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
    April 18, 2017, 1:23 am | # | Reply

    “What’s the difference between a duck?”

    • Seph
      April 18, 2017, 3:23 am | # | Reply

      I understand that one of its legs is both the same.

      • nebulousrikulau
        April 18, 2017, 5:13 am | # | Reply

        No, that’s the REASON that the answer to
        “What is the difference between a duck?” is …

        “A typewriter.”

        “Because one of his legs are both the same.”

      • matteo
        April 18, 2017, 1:10 pm | # | Reply

        The way I heard it, each the other is just the same.

    • John Campbell
      April 18, 2017, 1:02 pm | # | Reply

      One of them is covered in down.

  6. BarGamer
    April 18, 2017, 1:31 am | # | Reply

    Oh, this one’s easy. “Supposing you were a Buddhist, what is the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything?” The answer is silence, because Buddhists seek oblivion from the cycle of incarnation. And because silence is the same as not answering, you win.

    • casimir
      April 18, 2017, 1:38 am | # | Reply

      Ah, so THAT’s the sound of one hand clapping.

      • ranthalling
        April 18, 2017, 8:12 pm | # | Reply

        A butterfly

        • bitflipper
          September 12, 2017, 10:15 pm | # | Reply

          No, no, no; it’s “cl”. The other hand provides the ap.

    • Nobody
      April 18, 2017, 2:14 am | # | Reply

      But if Silence is the answer then by remaining silent IS answering you. Alternately the could just spell out that they still seek Oblivion.

    • Jon
      April 19, 2017, 1:09 am | # | Reply

      Ooh, I like that.

    • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
      April 19, 2017, 1:28 am | # | Reply

      Don’t be ridiculous, the answer is 42

  7. codebracker
    April 18, 2017, 2:07 am | # | Reply

    Why is a writing desk like a raven?

    • woozy
      April 18, 2017, 2:40 am | # | Reply

      Can’t answer, is not the same as has no answer. Many have answered that.

    • martinbentleymtb
      April 18, 2017, 4:05 am | # | Reply

      Because there is a ‘b’ in both and an ‘n’ in neither.

      • casimir
        April 18, 2017, 4:11 am | # | Reply

        I believe it’s pronounced neither.

    • arqyx
      April 18, 2017, 6:47 am | # | Reply

      They both have inky quills.

    • Cubist
      April 18, 2017, 8:51 am | # | Reply

      If memory serves, Reverend Dodgson provided an answer to that riddle in a private letter: THe only notes you can get from either one are flat.

      • Rex Vivat
        April 18, 2017, 1:30 pm | # | Reply

        “Because it can produce a few notes, tho they are very flat; and it is never put with the wrong end in front!”

        • woozy
          April 18, 2017, 8:53 pm | # | Reply

          Except the stupid editor “corrected” the word “nevar” to “never” missing the entire point of the second clause.

          • Rex Vivat
            April 18, 2017, 8:57 pm | #

            And so did my phone’s autocorrect, go figure.

          • woozy
            April 18, 2017, 9:03 pm | #

            I’m sorry about the autocorrect. I couldn’t believe my luck that some-one on *these* boards wouldn’t know that and I could arrogantly pontificate at. I jumped at the chance. I should have known everyone *here* would know that. … (and everyone everywhere else continues to look at me funny and not care…)

    • fkberthold
      April 18, 2017, 9:56 am | # | Reply

      Poe wrote on both.

    • Huttj
      April 18, 2017, 1:50 pm | # | Reply

      They are both nevar put backwards.

    • dornbeast
      April 19, 2017, 9:35 am | # | Reply

      1. Because the notes they are noted for are not musical notes.
      2. Because the one time that the Reverend Dodgson dreamed of a talking writing desk, all it would say was, “Nevermore!”

  8. Historian
    April 18, 2017, 4:25 am | # | Reply

    “What’s Irish and stays out in back of the house, even in the rain?”

    • Manifesta
      April 18, 2017, 4:59 am | # | Reply

      Paddy O’Furniture

  9. 5-tons-of-flax
    April 18, 2017, 5:17 am | # | Reply

    What’s brown and sounds like a bell?

    • Efogoto
      April 18, 2017, 8:03 pm | # | Reply

      DUNG!

  10. Barking Monkey
    April 18, 2017, 6:45 am | # | Reply

    How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie-roll pop? (In retrospect, I’m not sure why that kid thought forest animals would be the go-to knowledge base on that one.)

    • Pygar
      April 18, 2017, 2:49 pm | # | Reply

      Owls are allegedly wise…

  11. luciferlordofpride
    April 18, 2017, 10:44 am | # | Reply

    The first riddle I ever heard, one familiar to almost every Jewish child, was propounded to me by my father:
    “What is it that hangs on the wall, is green, wet — and whistles?”
    I knit my brow and thought and thought, and in final perplexity gave up.
    “A herring,” said my father.
    “A herring,” I echoed. “A herring doesn’t hang on the wall!”
    “So hang it there.”
    “But a herring isn’t green!” I protested.
    “Paint it.”
    “But a herring isn’t wet.”
    “If it’s just painted it’s still wet.”
    “But —” I sputtered, summoning all my outrage, “— a herring doesn’t whistle!!”
    “Right,” smiled my father. “I just put that in to make it hard.”
    — Leo Rosten, The Joys of Yiddish

    • Smithnik
      April 18, 2017, 12:22 pm | # | Reply

      That kind of riddle was used as a story point in a fantasy story by the late L. Sprague deCamp. The hero was trying to outwit a giantish creature, as I recall, and the riddle was something to the effect of “What’s green, has wheels, and runs around the house.”

    • kicking_k
      April 21, 2017, 5:47 am | # | Reply

      That comes up in *MirrorMask* as well. I didn’t know it was a pre-existing riddle!

  12. j_f_rivkin
    April 18, 2017, 11:36 am | # | Reply

    The best riddle ever was created by my friend’s grandfather:

    Q: Why is the sea salty?
    A: It’s because of all the herring!

    (OK, so if you weren’t brought up on that Jewish delicacy, unbelievably salty dried herring sticks, you might not get this, but I feel that this riddle deserves a much wider audience than my friend’s family and me.)

  13. Robert Nowall
    April 18, 2017, 1:17 pm | # | Reply

    The Anti-Sphinx is waiting,
    To serve her clientele.
    And with her laser eyeballs,
    She’ll send you straight to hell-

    O Nick and Lovelace.
    Wishing you some luck.
    You’re really up against it
    She doesn’t give a—

    Ducking’s not an option,
    You’ve got to see it through.
    Your guns are worse than useless,
    You’ve stepped into the–

    Do be awful careful.
    Don’t expect a pass.
    Remember, if she answers,
    She’ll burn your sorry—

    Ask the sphinx a question.
    Give her a surprise.
    The object is to stump her,
    So you won’t burn and die…

    —(I didn’t have time to post anything yesterday, but I did just now.)

    • OneUniverse
      April 18, 2017, 3:04 pm | # | Reply

      Shell? Duck? Brow? Glass? Wise?

  14. s854
    April 18, 2017, 2:15 pm | # | Reply

    My first is in fork but not in cork.
    My second is in duck but not in dock.
    My third is in tack but not in tank.
    My fourth is in back but not in bactrian camel.
    What am I?

    … because Whimsy.

  15. Frank
    April 18, 2017, 3:25 pm | # | Reply

    Antisphinx, Anasigma hmm

  16. Frank
    April 18, 2017, 3:27 pm | # | Reply

    I’m sure there’s other “An”s

    And, this being this comic, they’re all related

  17. Frank
    April 18, 2017, 3:28 pm | # | Reply

    Also, what is the capital of Assyria?

    • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
      April 18, 2017, 3:46 pm | # | Reply

      “A”

      • Rex Vivat
        April 18, 2017, 3:50 pm | # | Reply

        Oooh, that’s a good one.

    • Rex Vivat
      April 18, 2017, 3:49 pm | # | Reply

      Since the question is in the present tense, the answer is “none”, because it doesn’t exist anymore. Too bad Sir Robin didn’t think of that, huh?

  18. Shadowmehr
    April 18, 2017, 7:51 pm | # | Reply

    Since this is a Whimsy-based world, if somewhat twisted, Nick and company will need to come up with a classic riddle. Otherwise there are a few mathematical problems that I’m sure they could use to break the Antisphinx (xnihpS?) along with the rest of the world. Alas, alack.

  19. Chris
    April 18, 2017, 8:32 pm | # | Reply

    “What is the eternal Tao?”

    (For the uninitiated, any answer it can say is by definition wrong, because “the Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao.”)

    • casimir
      April 18, 2017, 11:59 pm | # | Reply

      Nowhere is it writ that it has to be the right answer.

    • Sailorleo
      May 19, 2017, 2:04 am | # | Reply

      Except there is still a valid answer to the question: ‘mu’.

      • bitflipper
        September 12, 2017, 10:23 pm | # | Reply

        “Mu” to the answer; there is a correct answer to the question, “What is the eternal Tao?” But the answer can only be experienced, not spoken.

  20. Pygar
    April 18, 2017, 11:33 pm | # | Reply

    Ask about coconut-laden swallows!

    • OneUniverse
      April 19, 2017, 12:56 am | # | Reply

      European or African?

  21. jdreyfuss
    January 29, 2020, 12:29 pm | # | Reply

    Who is phone?

  22. Knuckles
    February 3, 2022, 11:34 am | # | Reply

    Why do they call it oven when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food?

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