To the tune of “At the Gala”. Music and Lyrics by Daniel Ingram
I’m a Zombie!
Chorus: She’s a Zombie!
I’m a Zombie / in St. Charlie / and I’m going to join a Lurch!
It’s a party / and we’re groaning for some bra-ains!
Chorus: She’s a Zombie!
It’s exciting / to be fright’ning / and be marching in a ho-oarde!
And we’re lurching ever forward / right here in St. Charlie!
Chorus: All your dreams will come true / be-cause you’re a Zombie! She’s a Zombie!
In St. Charlie (In St. Charlie)/ I will tell them (really sell ’em)/ ’bout my battle-tastic limbs! (watch those limbs!)
Jealous Zombies! (Are we jealous?) / They will want them! (Do we need them?) / Because they are really neat! (Yeah, they’re neat!)
And I’ll have a lot of pleasure / lurching in St. Charlie!
Chorus: All your dreams and your hopes from now until hereafter, all the lurching you can do is right here in St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
In St. Charlie / all the Zombies / they will meet fair U.N.I.T.Y.
They will see that I am Un-dead in St. Charlie! (In St. Charlie!)
In a moment they’ll know how en-thusiastic I can be! / They will treat me like a lurcher / right here in St. Charlie!
Chorus: This is what we’ve waited for / to have the best Lurch ever! All of us will eat some brains / right here In St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
Been dreamin’ / I’ve been waitin’ / to Lurch with these great Zombies!
My Skin Horse friends / should see me now! Eatin’ brains and other stuff!
Rend limbs in crowds of thousands / they’ll come at us with shotguns!
The blood and guts will splatter right here in St. Charlie!
Chorus: All you’ve longed for / all you’ve dreamed / your happy ever after!
Finally it will come true / right here in St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
I am right here in St. Charlie / just as happy as can be! / Don’t you wish you had the luck of a Zombie named U.N.I.T.Y!
For I am the best at lurching / anyone can plainly see! Zombies moaning! Zombies shuffling! With me in old St. Charlie!
Chorus: Zombies are a-moaning in St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
In St. Charlie (In St. Charlie)/ with the lurchers (With the lurchers)/ is where I want to be! (She will be!) I will yell real loud for bra-ains and eat up all that I see!
Chorus: This will be the best Lurch ever!
Into St. Charlie we will go / our purity died long ago!
Into St. Charlie / let’s go in and have the best Lurch ever!
Into St. Charlie / now’s the time / we’re rotting and we smell like grime!
Chorus: Into St. Charlie!
Join the Lurch!
Chorus: Into St. Charlie!
It’s exciting!
Chorus: Into St. Charlie!
I’m Un-dead!
Chorus: Eat some brains!
As a Zombie does!
To Eat! To Lurch! To rend! To march! To shuffle and moan!
Chorus: In St. Charlie! In St. Charlie! And we’ll have the best Lurch ever!
What do I spy?
A horde goes lurching by!
Zombies packed in tightly,
Staggering down the hall!
Moaning “brains”
Simple and plain …
It’s the same old refrain,
There’s no improvisation at all!
I hear the zombies say, Brains, baby, brains!
Feast on remains! Brains, baby, brains!
If you’re feeling bored … Brains, baby, brains!
No wilder strains! Brains, baby, brains!
Find another horde!
A little late to mention it, but… what happened to cyborg angel mad scientist lady’s metal faceplate thingamabob when she was talking to Sweetheart? Is it detachable, or was it… SOMEONE IN DISGUISE?!?
It is, in fact. Just in case she needs to disguise herself as an ordinary human so that she can go to an awards dinner to receive a large cash grant for her hypertext poetry or some such.
“Regrettably, the politicisation of the zombie community has lead in some quarters to intolerance of those who do not resemble a certain ideal of the Modern Zombie. Zombies have proved that they can learn from the wider society that surrounds them. In many ways, they have learnt to repeat our mistakes.” (Victor Frankenstein VIII: “Reflections in a Dead Eyeball” p289, Miskatonic University Press 2008)
The Zombie Rights Campaign has actually observed this phenomenon in the real world. Although it’s a hot-button issue for some, we feel there’s no ‘wrong’ way to Lurch, so long as it’s with pride.
Well, she *is* a newbie at it. I’m sure she’ll catch on to all the community’s protocols quickly enough and that they’ll understand she’s not trying to be a troll. ^_^
Tch. Damn purists, sucking the fun out of everything.
Exclusionism is common to many different kind of sentients, I see.
Unity’s been spending too much time with the living.
Yes, this is going to be the best gala ever.
Now you’ve done it:
To the tune of “At the Gala”. Music and Lyrics by Daniel Ingram
I’m a Zombie!
Chorus: She’s a Zombie!
I’m a Zombie / in St. Charlie / and I’m going to join a Lurch!
It’s a party / and we’re groaning for some bra-ains!
Chorus: She’s a Zombie!
It’s exciting / to be fright’ning / and be marching in a ho-oarde!
And we’re lurching ever forward / right here in St. Charlie!
Chorus: All your dreams will come true / be-cause you’re a Zombie! She’s a Zombie!
In St. Charlie (In St. Charlie)/ I will tell them (really sell ’em)/ ’bout my battle-tastic limbs! (watch those limbs!)
Jealous Zombies! (Are we jealous?) / They will want them! (Do we need them?) / Because they are really neat! (Yeah, they’re neat!)
And I’ll have a lot of pleasure / lurching in St. Charlie!
Chorus: All your dreams and your hopes from now until hereafter, all the lurching you can do is right here in St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
In St. Charlie / all the Zombies / they will meet fair U.N.I.T.Y.
They will see that I am Un-dead in St. Charlie! (In St. Charlie!)
In a moment they’ll know how en-thusiastic I can be! / They will treat me like a lurcher / right here in St. Charlie!
Chorus: This is what we’ve waited for / to have the best Lurch ever! All of us will eat some brains / right here In St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
Been dreamin’ / I’ve been waitin’ / to Lurch with these great Zombies!
My Skin Horse friends / should see me now! Eatin’ brains and other stuff!
Rend limbs in crowds of thousands / they’ll come at us with shotguns!
The blood and guts will splatter right here in St. Charlie!
Chorus: All you’ve longed for / all you’ve dreamed / your happy ever after!
Finally it will come true / right here in St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
I am right here in St. Charlie / just as happy as can be! / Don’t you wish you had the luck of a Zombie named U.N.I.T.Y!
For I am the best at lurching / anyone can plainly see! Zombies moaning! Zombies shuffling! With me in old St. Charlie!
Chorus: Zombies are a-moaning in St. Charlie! In St. Charlie!
In St. Charlie (In St. Charlie)/ with the lurchers (With the lurchers)/ is where I want to be! (She will be!) I will yell real loud for bra-ains and eat up all that I see!
Chorus: This will be the best Lurch ever!
Into St. Charlie we will go / our purity died long ago!
Into St. Charlie / let’s go in and have the best Lurch ever!
Into St. Charlie / now’s the time / we’re rotting and we smell like grime!
Chorus: Into St. Charlie!
Join the Lurch!
Chorus: Into St. Charlie!
It’s exciting!
Chorus: Into St. Charlie!
I’m Un-dead!
Chorus: Eat some brains!
As a Zombie does!
To Eat! To Lurch! To rend! To march! To shuffle and moan!
Chorus: In St. Charlie! In St. Charlie! And we’ll have the best Lurch ever!
In St. Charlie!
… I love you. Marry me.
I guess she’s too advanced.
(TUNE: “Disco Inferno”, The Trammps)
Brains, baby, brains … brains, baby, brains!
Brains, baby, brains … brains, baby, brains!
What do I spy?
A horde goes lurching by!
Zombies packed in tightly,
Staggering down the hall!
Moaning “brains”
Simple and plain …
It’s the same old refrain,
There’s no improvisation at all!
I hear the zombies say,
Brains, baby, brains!
Feast on remains!
Brains, baby, brains!
If you’re feeling bored …
Brains, baby, brains!
No wilder strains!
Brains, baby, brains!
Find another horde!
There’s always one in every horde.
A little late to mention it, but… what happened to cyborg angel mad scientist lady’s metal faceplate thingamabob when she was talking to Sweetheart? Is it detachable, or was it… SOMEONE IN DISGUISE?!?
It is, in fact. Just in case she needs to disguise herself as an ordinary human so that she can go to an awards dinner to receive a large cash grant for her hypertext poetry or some such.
“Regrettably, the politicisation of the zombie community has lead in some quarters to intolerance of those who do not resemble a certain ideal of the Modern Zombie. Zombies have proved that they can learn from the wider society that surrounds them. In many ways, they have learnt to repeat our mistakes.” (Victor Frankenstein VIII: “Reflections in a Dead Eyeball” p289, Miskatonic University Press 2008)
I think U.N.I.T.Y. is formed of her own horde.
So, is that a hipster zombie, then? Is he lurching ironically?
The Zombie Rights Campaign has actually observed this phenomenon in the real world. Although it’s a hot-button issue for some, we feel there’s no ‘wrong’ way to Lurch, so long as it’s with pride.
Well, she *is* a newbie at it. I’m sure she’ll catch on to all the community’s protocols quickly enough and that they’ll understand she’s not trying to be a troll. ^_^