Wouldn’t work – Princesses are supposed to have a well rounded education – I’m pretty sure he’d have heard of and read the “sleeping beauty” trilogy by Anne Rampling (Anne Rice pen-name).
NOTHING “pure and innocent” by the end of that trilogy.
oh Joy! I knew it would be Nick or Tip as soon as the piggy said they could only tell a princess. Mind you I was leaning towards Nick because of exactly this.
In a run-down ride called the Little House
Lived a nutty squirrel and a too-cute mouse
And a pig in a wig and more.
But one day, at last, Skin Horse came, at last
to at last hear a little about the last
of the knowledge about the Old War.
But a princess is, a necessary thing?
…
…
Um, HELP!? I CAN’T DO THIS?
(*Wishes I were Ed and magic*)
[CHORUS:]
For a princess is the thing that’s required,
One, by all the Whimsy creatures, loved and admired …
You don’t need a kingdom, or a castle, or loot,
’Cause a fantasy princess only has to look cute!
To the Little House, there in Illinois,
Came an ersatz girl who was once a boy,
And who hated Whimsy so!
With his plastic skin and his metal frame,
Ev’ryone thought he was a lovely dame!
But he said, “Oh, fennel no …”
[spoken]
“We will know her thus,” said Cunningham,
“She can’t say f**k or s**t or p**s or c**t or d*mn,
And she’ll wear a poofy dress of dantiest pink …
If she meets all those conditions, she’s a princess. I think.”
Though a newbie here might just think it odd
That a former boy with a plastic bod
Could be loved by all who see …
But the true-blue fans have all guessed before,
With the help of Tip, he’ll be soon made o’er
And a princess he will be!
(And the fans all clap their hands and go “squeeeeeeeee!”) [CHORUS]
(TUNE: “Many Moons Ago”, from Once Upon A Mattress, Mary Rodgers & Marshall Barer)
Princess Nick is so innocent and pure of heart, she thinks “fennel” is a swear!!! If only her posture was better, she’d be my favouritest princess evah!!!
[This strip also seems to be ground zero for some kind of Cutsey Animal Art-Trope Explosion. Teddy-bear mouth in Panel Two, lop-eared bashful donkey in Three, birds hovering with their eyes closed….]
Heck of it is, in his “research” on all the things he “hates”, he might be better informed on all things Whimsy than the actual daughter. And the (literally) finely tuned reflexes of the drone might help in the physical requirements of princesshood. Running, jumping, dancing (Get Tip away from the video game long enough to teach him). And he can set the vocoder to sing songs for him.
Although him trying to remember the words might be amusing.
Or, conversely, “Little birdies take wing/ Flitting down from the trees they appear and to chirp in my ear/ All because I sing! Ahhhhh…” [insert Immigrant Song]
Alternatively, they’re looking for a Princess of the Magic Robot Kingdom.
They’re animatronic; he’s animatronic. He definitely smells of oil and engine in his other body, which might have rubbed off on the drone. What more would they really want?
The “incapable of swearing” and “knows them all by name” bits are just.princessy bonuses.
Oh, perfect!
Yes. YES.
Poor Nick. Unfortunately, he’s like Dave from Narbonic: seeing him suffer is always funny.
Right? Only Dave was a Mad Genius and Nick is an Angry Script Kid.
This can only go wonderful places. For us, of course. Nick’s going to be acutely uncomfortable for a good deal of it.
More like chronically uncomfortable, I’m guessing.
No, no. He’ll be pretty cute in the princess getup, so a-cute-ly is appropriate.
This IS the best of all possible worlds!!
Why did I expect this?
Really, is there any other possible way this could have gone?
This won’t last long. All Nick has to do to prove he’s not a princess is bust out some swear words.
Oh, right…
Wouldn’t work – Princesses are supposed to have a well rounded education – I’m pretty sure he’d have heard of and read the “sleeping beauty” trilogy by Anne Rampling (Anne Rice pen-name).
NOTHING “pure and innocent” by the end of that trilogy.
Heck, by the end of the first CHAPTER!!!! Glad to see we were all right about Nick’s impending princesshood. This is going to be FUNNY!
One would have thought the slouch and violent video games would have already done it. Tip is going to be terribly sorry he missed this.
oh Joy!
I knew it would be Nick or Tip as soon as the piggy said they could only tell a princess. Mind you I was leaning towards Nick because of exactly this. 
So is that Nut-Nut the Squirrel in the foreground? And how would he react if Nick mentioned the Hot Coffee mod?
Crosshatching on the tail makes it more likely a gratuitous beaver.
JOY!!!
Ahahahahahaha! Yes!
Day made!
Perfect body language. And his new body has a blush response, how precious. Tip is really going to regret missing that.
Aww, I was hoping the princess would be Nick Cricetida
Now all he needs is one of those poofy dresses.
In a run-down ride called the Little House
Lived a nutty squirrel and a too-cute mouse
And a pig in a wig and more.
But one day, at last, Skin Horse came, at last
to at last hear a little about the last
of the knowledge about the Old War.
But a princess is, a necessary thing?
…
…
Um, HELP!? I CAN’T DO THIS?
(*Wishes I were Ed and magic*)
Help is on the way … (continuing from above)
[CHORUS:]
For a princess is the thing that’s required,
One, by all the Whimsy creatures, loved and admired …
You don’t need a kingdom, or a castle, or loot,
’Cause a fantasy princess only has to look cute!
To the Little House, there in Illinois,
Came an ersatz girl who was once a boy,
And who hated Whimsy so!
With his plastic skin and his metal frame,
Ev’ryone thought he was a lovely dame!
But he said, “Oh, fennel no …”
[spoken]
“We will know her thus,” said Cunningham,
“She can’t say f**k or s**t or p**s or c**t or d*mn,
And she’ll wear a poofy dress of dantiest pink …
If she meets all those conditions, she’s a princess. I think.”
Though a newbie here might just think it odd
That a former boy with a plastic bod
Could be loved by all who see …
But the true-blue fans have all guessed before,
With the help of Tip, he’ll be soon made o’er
And a princess he will be!
(And the fans all clap their hands and go “squeeeeeeeee!”)
[CHORUS]
(TUNE: “Many Moons Ago”, from Once Upon A Mattress, Mary Rodgers & Marshall Barer)
Oh, that’s just sweet. Ed, you Good Samaritan.
Ed, that was glorious. You’re some kind of mad musical theoretician or something.
Oh thank you, good Ed!
My hero! *Swoons*
Ed, your avatar has never been so mighty appropriate.
Makeover!
FINGERS yeah!
i bet it was his secret childhood dream
the stories aren’t even about whatever prince….
I believe half the readers owe the other half of the readers ten bucks each.
Oh crack. I knew I should’ve put a bet in there
….ok, I have to back up on what I said earlier now. Nick might have been my dark horse candidate but this was pretty hilarious and works pretty well.
Alas, Princess-Style Tip. Your time was not nigh
Prince-Style Tip may still be in the running though, if these movies are as obsessed with couples as their real world counterparts.
Princess Nick is so innocent and pure of heart, she thinks “fennel” is a swear!!! If only her posture was better, she’d be my favouritest princess evah!!!
[This strip also seems to be ground zero for some kind of Cutsey Animal Art-Trope Explosion. Teddy-bear mouth in Panel Two, lop-eared bashful donkey in Three, birds hovering with their eyes closed….]
Yeeeeup. The whole thing was a build up for a cuteness explosion. I bet Shannon planned it all along
Heck of it is, in his “research” on all the things he “hates”, he might be better informed on all things Whimsy than the actual daughter. And the (literally) finely tuned reflexes of the drone might help in the physical requirements of princesshood. Running, jumping, dancing (Get Tip away from the video game long enough to teach him). And he can set the vocoder to sing songs for him.
Although him trying to remember the words might be amusing.
You got Snow White Syndrome, Nick. Only one way this can end: musical numbers.
(Background Singers) “He’s going to tell… He’s going to tell…”
Or, conversely, “Little birdies take wing/ Flitting down from the trees they appear and to chirp in my ear/ All because I sing! Ahhhhh…” [insert Immigrant Song]
Oh [fennel] yes!
I’m wondering if this is because the Violet Bee body has ‘princess perfume’ on it. (Like how it has/had ‘brain perfume’ IIRC)
Alternatively, they’re looking for a Princess of the Magic Robot Kingdom.
They’re animatronic; he’s animatronic. He definitely smells of oil and engine in his other body, which might have rubbed off on the drone. What more would they really want?
The “incapable of swearing” and “knows them all by name” bits are just.princessy bonuses.
First thought: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FriendToAllLivingThings
Also? “Scamper” is an excellent sound effect.
Well…
Pure rage *is* a kind of purity of the heart…