Skin Horse
By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
Skin Horse by Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at http://www.skin-horse.com.
©2007-2018 Skin Horse Powered by WordPress with ComicPress
How much lettuce?
I’m sure it’s a *huge* amount, the best lettuce!
Was that a clockwork pigeon?
Can’t Unity just pose as HT with those ears and hand all the turtles lettuce to sway them? Also, maybe draw some turtles wearing bandanas and carrying around tiny weapons.
I can just imagine those tiny turtles eating raspberries. (The end appearance is rather horrific.)
AH, and there’s the plan.
There’s a similar scam in “Accelerando” by Charles Stross- the post-human AIs create thousands of duplicates of historical figures and send them to the human colony on Saturn to sway election results.
Called it! http://skin-horse.com/comic/break-room/#comment-221741
Winning national elections is going to requite millions of turtles. That’s a lot of lettuce.
Require, I mean.
I suspect the Skin Horse universe has just as many issues with gerrymandering as ours.
Really, I think the limiting factor is going to be residency and ID *paperwork* rather than lettuce…
Romaine or leaf lettuce, I hope. Iceberg is tasty but does not have enough nutrients for turtles.
Iceberg lettuce is objectively non-tasty.
The only thing iceberg lettuce is good for is acting as a vehicle for salad dressing.
Crunchy.
Iceberg lettuce does not have enough nutrients, period. Or taste. It is biologically-produced cardboard without the useful planarity.
I heard you didn’t like vegetables, so we took the vegetable out of your vegetables, so you don’t have to eat vegetables while eating your vegetables.
I apologize for the memes, but it seemed appropriate.
I foresee one minor hitch. You still have to be 18 years old to vote.
To have any significant effect many sentients would have to have to live significantly longer than their non-sentient cousins, or only be able to vote in their final years. Then again seniors have better voter turnout.
Would they qualify for AARP? (In Sweetheart’s case would it be … no, never mind.)
Under the new sapient legislation, it may be different for non-humans, based on the age at which they are deemed to be ‘adult.’ Since many animals develop out of their adolescence a lot quicker than humans do, that may still work in H.T.’s favor.
Turtles can live into their two hundreds—what they don’t vote for now they’ll vote in later.
Originally, I thought that the problem would be solvable by granting voting rights at the equivalent development point, but then I realized that such a point would be difficult to determine due to many creations of mad science being unique or altered so much so that what we do know would be hard to apply (not to mention that we’re still learning about how the human brain develops with age). You could administer intelligence tests, but requiring passing a literacy test to vote was a significant method of withholding voting rights from minorities, so it would probably end up as a repeat of old hurdles.
Yeah. I don’t know how the authors are getting around the question of the voting age. Anything like literacy tests or intelligence tests would be highly unreliable for the reasons you specify above; on the other hand, granting transgenics, unlike all other citizens, the special right to vote below 18 years of age would be problematic – it might result in the whole thing getting struck down in court.
I don’t know what the solution will be, or even if this is something that would be solved, instead of something the authors are planning to quietly ignore.
I know a story where the genetically-engineered “biorgs” were ruled to be minors regardless of age or model: “Reduced volition, ignorant of social contexts” etc. In an airport, for example, they have to be booked in through the Accompanied Passengers desk.
This here’s a story about voting rights and seeing through
Gummit workers with plenty better to do
Than take time off, to preach the multitude
And here is what happened, when they invented an excuse
They found a group there, ooh, and they polled them
Pickin’ up the line, that Skin Horse has sold them
Goin’ to the polls, vote how H. T. told them
Turtles there ate the lettuce for fun
Go on, eat the lettuce for fun
Go on, eat the lettuce for fun
Go on, eat the lettuce for fun
Go on, eat the lettuce for fun
—from “Take the Money and Run,” Steve Miller Band.
no capital letters allowed for tiny turtles
Does the legislation include ways to interpret what will happen to voting demographics for the benefit of the one in five Americans who will be completely unable to understand where all these new votes are coming from?
Human Americans, I should have said.
…is there any such thing as a sapient creation of Mad Science that is itself weirdness-blind, or is that only an issue with baseline humans?
Sounds like a challenge.
To the lab!
Well, there’s that one bird that thinks he’s a human. Although, he’s aware that there are non-human sapients. Does he qualify?
Wisdom and lettuce. Hell, he’s got my vote.
It occurs to me that any of those sapient turtles that have been purchased as pets would actually be considered slaves, and would need to be released… or adopted as dependents.
“There’s an awful lot of lettuce for the fellow who can get us there…”
Politics being decided by whoever can spread the most lettuce around. Some would say that’s business as usual. Others might be cynical about the process.
And there’s the trick of the matter. Puppet politicians.
I guess next H.T. will start a corrupt multi-national corporation.