…aaaaaaaaaaand told ya.
They are leading us along w/ obvious plot points – I’m waiting for that unexpected twist – My guess is another week max.
(TUNE: “I Am A Rock”, Simon & Garfunkel)
We’re gonna die!
It’s a deep and dark disaster!
Good-bye, St. Cha-a-ar-lie!
We’ve got a horde of zombies, lurching through the halls,
This day just bites enormous baboon balls!
You people suck!
I’ll side with sci-i-i-ence!
What is this now?
Ms. Violet Bee has joined us!
She says, “You nee-e-eed me!
GODOT cannot confuse me, I am a machine,
I only see what truly can be seen!”
The laser bars
That made her cell, have shut down!
A door that turns itself off? That just makes no sense!
“But lasers are so cool!” is your defense …
(Though you suck, you’ll be saved,
’Cause the core cast never dies …)
Well done, sir! And you may claim credit for the fact that “This day just bites enormous baboon balls” has entered my stock of colorful phrases for use as the occasion warrants.
Also, the refrain of your song sent my brain here:
(TUNE: “The Sounds of Silence,” written by Paul Simon)
Hello, Violet! How the crud
You walking ’round this neighborhood?
Guess your experimental laser cell
Was just too awesome to work all that well.
And if the smart guy with the glasses has his say,
We’ve won the day.
This time I’ll side with science.
Though Ruby says it’s suicide,
The Skin Horse team will have to try
To run all through this super-crazy train
And shut that mad computer off again.
While GODOT still runs, can’t trust anything we see.
(Where’s Doctor Lee?)
But still I’ll side with science.
And in the corridor I saw
Ten thousand zombies, maybe more–
Zombies moaning without speaking,
Zombies lurching without creaking,
Zombies craving brains that machines no more dispense.
(This makes no sense!
I blame this all on science!)
“You,” said Sweet, “are not my folks
If you like orders more than jokes.”
That McGuire chick’s kinda rad, though
She’s not much for making Shadow
Alligators that can chaw on Sweetheart’s ears.
But lasers, hey? Three cheers for science!
Now here we are, trapped on this train,
With zombie pher’mones uncontained
And no signs we can rely on
‘Cause GODOT monkeys with our neurons.
Like if a sign says, “Delicious frozen yogurt with chocolate chips and cukes,”
It might mean, “Nukes.”
And that’s why I will side with science!
I suppose one could argue that Violet Bee… is going to become Violent Bee.
That was terrible and I’m not as sorry as I should be.
“Should be”? Why would you want to be sorry for a pun?
Given it’s widely suspected the person behind Violet has a military background, it’s quite possible. I don’t suppose anyone has excellent low light vision or a pair of NVGs handy?
I have excellent low light vision!
…It hurts when I go outside.
No, no, Unity, Sergio’s right.
They’re both right.
Lasers *are* awesome!
This. This right here.
I’d be surprised if anything aboard St. Charlie besides some small portable items, mostly brought by one of the two black ops teams, is not experimental.
Technically speaking, a good half of the Black Ops teams here probably qualify under ‘Experimental’
Yeah, we’re lucky that Unity, Sweetheart, Violet, Nick, and Tip’s sexuality didn’t shut down.
Please, be realistic. Tip’s sexuality? You couldn’t get rid of that with a nuclear strike.
We may be about to find out.
I feel like someone needs to filk the Plain White T’s “Natural Disaster” here, but I only have time to do a chorus variant myself:
I don’t know what GODOT is after
It’s just an un… natural disaster!
Full of zombies
It’s us they’re after…
It’s just an un… natural disaster!
She said she worked for St. Charlie.
That girl’s a legend on the corpse-hunt scene.
Her badge was scribbles on loose-leaf.
And she just wouldn’t let by one zombie.
She made the train cars safe for life,
Chopping up zombies like a butcher knife.
Carving up every corpse in sight,
She was so scary that I
Forgot to hit on her that night.
Though I know what that girl was after-
She’s unnatural, anti-zombie master-
She sexy but
I just wouldn’t have her.
Unnatural. Killing zombies faster.
Eh. I don’t feel like doing the rest of the verses anyway. Half of what’s left is chorus, and half the remainder is repeated anyway, so I’d have to concentrate more than I feel like at 5:48 A.M. Maybe I’ll finish it on my next archive binge.
I’m gonna guess ViBe is blind.
Fun little horrifying paranoid thought. What if Godot actually can control auditory senses as well, and this is just a very dedicated illusion?
Ah, they now have to trust the one person they should not?
Another advantage Violet would bring to the group is that due to her body has (to the best of my knowledge) no organic components and thus should be quite Zombie resistant*. That is, if Zombies would actually take much notice of Violet in the first place.
Violet could be used as a blocking device in the unlikely event that they encounter any Zombies. (?) Surprise plot twist, they make it to GODOT without any Zombie encounters? With all the leadup and forshadowing, it would be quite evil(?) of Jeffrey and Shaenon to not give their readers some frantic Zombie related pages.
* That is assuming that all Zombies on St.Charlie are organic based. Any robotic Zombies would find Violet quite tasty indeed. >>insert inappropriate gyroscopic array comment here<<
It must be past my bedtime – I caught myself wondering what kind of drinks they serve at lazer bars….
mostly “lite” beer
Anyone else remember that ViBe can’t see GODOT’s writing? That’s why they need her, she can tell them what’s real and what isn’t.
Well, ok, she can tell them if something’s done by GODOT. Around here, reality is a rather fluid concept.
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