At some point, the designers of the BrainOmat had this conversation:
“So, say something goes wrong with the dispensers and you’ve got a huge crowd of brain-ravenous zombies outside getting angry and irrational. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“They might break in and take the brains without paying. So we use some kind of unbreakable super-glass. Problem solved, everyone happy, right?”
I find myself compelled to protest the unreasonable situation which has been presented. It’s not the moving city, or the brain dispenser for zombies. No, it’s the sign reading.
No one reads the sign on a vending machine before they push the button. 😛
I may not get many ideas for filks, but this strip practically begged for this song – and didn’t even need much modification, in many places!
Tune: “The Wall”, Pink Floyd; parts 1-3 combined
GODOT’s gone and crossed the line now,
Playing with our memory.
Signs to make us meet our maker,
GODOT, what else did you make us see?
GODOT, what else did you make us see?
All in all it was just a word on the wall.
All in all it was all just words on the wall.
—
I don’t need no ammunition,
I just use my thought control.
No Brainomat to tame the zombies,
Lurching now for brains alone.
Saint Charlie! Lurch for brains alone!
All in all it’s just another word on the wall.
All in all you’re just another word on the wall.
[Undead chorus]
He don’t need no ammunition,
He just uses thought control.
No Brainomat to tame us zombies,
Lurching now for brains alone.
Saint Charlie! Lurch for brains alone!
All in all it’s just another word on the wall.
All in all you’re just another word on the wall.
[/undead chorus]
—
“Words bend to my will. I’ll mislabel every button. Corrupt every monitor.”
“I’m your failure. the UNITY project. The one acronym you couldn’t finish”
“I do not have mental problems. I merely wish to wipe out a train city because I am bad at acronyms”
I don’t need no arms to hurt you,
I don’t need no drugs to harm you,
I have been the writing on the wall.
Only words and you will do it all.
Yes! All I need to make you do it all.
All in all it was all just words on the wall.
All in all you were all just words on the wall.
Allright, I can’t for the life of me figure out what crenellations would be in a biology context (unless of course they’re using a zombie definition of the word that is unknown to us pre-mortem mortals). As interesting as the idea of a brain with medieval fortifications is, I am wondering if anyone knows what Bob is talking about?
Perhaps it will be up to Unity to give a rousing speech that will help the zombies overcome their hunger for brains and stop them from devouring the populace? Or she could just join them… Yeah, probably that.
I think GODOT may be overplaying his hand a bit. All it would take is one zombie who is not quite brainy enough to read but still knows to put coins in and push a button, and this part of his scheme is not only over, but more zombies will know his font.
No battle plan survives contact with the undead hordes.
That may stop your run of the mill zombie, but Unity’d just break the glass and eat the brains inside.
Also why she was fired from her job henching for Professor Glassdome.
At some point, the designers of the BrainOmat had this conversation:
“So, say something goes wrong with the dispensers and you’ve got a huge crowd of brain-ravenous zombies outside getting angry and irrational. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“They might break in and take the brains without paying. So we use some kind of unbreakable super-glass. Problem solved, everyone happy, right?”
Mad science means never having to say you’re sorry. (Usually to whatever’s on the slab.)
….uh-oh.
Hopefully some of the zombies are German?
Cue ominous music…..
I bet he will try pushing the button anyway and it will work anyway (You can’t outsmart me ’cause I’m a moron!)
(TUNE: “(It’s Gonna Be A) Great Day”, Vincent Youmans & Edward Eliscu)
When you’re dining at
Your local Brain-O-Mat,
You’re gonna hunger for braaAAAiiins …
When you’re in the zone,
Throw out your arms and moan,
Lurching and searching for braaAAAiiins …
The sign says, “Out of or-der”!
Won’t take my quart-er!
Well, c’est la mort!
Soon, we’ll mindlessly
Cause utter anarchy!
Moaning pathetic’ly, “BraaAAAiiins!”
And all hell breaks loose in 5 . . .
Heya Tom, it’s Bob, from the office down the hall!
Good to see you buddy, how you been?
It’s the Bob and Tom Show!
http://www.bobandtom.com
It would be awesome if they started singing along to that as they are seeking out new sustenance.
Actually, I can see U.N.I.T.Y. singing that as every other zombie started seeking out new sustenance.
That’s GODOT’s font, of course.
DANGIT. Now i’m going to have to re-read to see if there IS a single font for GODOT.
PROTIP: There is. It’s that one.
I find myself compelled to protest the unreasonable situation which has been presented. It’s not the moving city, or the brain dispenser for zombies. No, it’s the sign reading.
No one reads the sign on a vending machine before they push the button. 😛
It helps when the vending machine plants the message directly in your mind rather than relying on you reading it.
The machines in your office will soon be upgraded to use this technique. You will buy what they tell you to buy!
I hope one of them goes the standard route of ignoring the sign and hammering the button anyway.
I may not get many ideas for filks, but this strip practically begged for this song – and didn’t even need much modification, in many places!
Tune: “The Wall”, Pink Floyd; parts 1-3 combined
GODOT’s gone and crossed the line now,
Playing with our memory.
Signs to make us meet our maker,
GODOT, what else did you make us see?
GODOT, what else did you make us see?
All in all it was just a word on the wall.
All in all it was all just words on the wall.
—
I don’t need no ammunition,
I just use my thought control.
No Brainomat to tame the zombies,
Lurching now for brains alone.
Saint Charlie! Lurch for brains alone!
All in all it’s just another word on the wall.
All in all you’re just another word on the wall.
[Undead chorus]
He don’t need no ammunition,
He just uses thought control.
No Brainomat to tame us zombies,
Lurching now for brains alone.
Saint Charlie! Lurch for brains alone!
All in all it’s just another word on the wall.
All in all you’re just another word on the wall.
[/undead chorus]
—
“Words bend to my will. I’ll mislabel every button. Corrupt every monitor.”
“I’m your failure. the UNITY project. The one acronym you couldn’t finish”
“I do not have mental problems. I merely wish to wipe out a train city because I am bad at acronyms”
I don’t need no arms to hurt you,
I don’t need no drugs to harm you,
I have been the writing on the wall.
Only words and you will do it all.
Yes! All I need to make you do it all.
All in all it was all just words on the wall.
All in all you were all just words on the wall.
Bravo! Now I really want to hear an undead chorus.
A customer noticing an out of order sign and actually reading it and understanding its message? You’ve strayed too far from reality this time!
Oh he’ll no I am NOT taking this service call…
Allright, I can’t for the life of me figure out what crenellations would be in a biology context (unless of course they’re using a zombie definition of the word that is unknown to us pre-mortem mortals). As interesting as the idea of a brain with medieval fortifications is, I am wondering if anyone knows what Bob is talking about?
Perhaps it will be up to Unity to give a rousing speech that will help the zombies overcome their hunger for brains and stop them from devouring the populace? Or she could just join them… Yeah, probably that.
He’s probably referring to the sulci, the folds in the brain. Leave it to marketers, though, to use a crinklier word.
I suppose more sulci would probably mean a more tender brain and a finer dining experience. More brain for your buck. Thanks for the answer.
Since I was at Convolution weekend-before-last, I can answer that question.
You wouldn’t happen to be THE Steve Jackson, perchance?
DUN DUN DUN!
I think GODOT may be overplaying his hand a bit. All it would take is one zombie who is not quite brainy enough to read but still knows to put coins in and push a button, and this part of his scheme is not only over, but more zombies will know his font.
No battle plan survives contact with the undead hordes.
awwww, he is triggering a mini zombie apocalypse… how cute!
The machine stops
Here’s one for the Skin Horse soundtrack album:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZftIZtU5mU&index=29&list=PL241FE9076F684C93
(I’m surprised nobody posted this one before, actually…)