Justin Grubbs (the_purple_knight) says:
Shaenon, would you please, please, please, tell us all what those door say? I am curious beyond all reason.
P.S. How many ways can an eyeball really melt?
James Rice (jhrice) says: Most days at my job aren’t all that special, but some days are just like that. I don’t melt eyes, but I do get to play with fire, and heavy machinery.
Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says:
Bureau of Precambrian Defense
Always gotta be on guard for those velociraptors.
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:
The first one is “Clerk of the Clerk of Clerks,” the second is indeed “Bureau of Precambrian Defense,” and the last two are, I think, legible enough.
We have Jeffrey and his years in the civil service to thank for all of these excellent department names.
Daniel Ross (nentuaby) says: “Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says:
Bureau of Precambrian Defense
Always gotta be on guard for those velociraptors.”
Velociraptors are the FAR, FAR future from a pre-cambrian viewpoint. Only toward the last bit of that era did multicellular life even evolve, and hard bits (shells only in that era, skeletons didn’t come until way later) only at the very tippy-top end. Life wouldn’t hit land for nonks.
Owl Who says South (owlsayssouth) says:
yeah. Velociraptors indeed.
Obviously the Bureau of Precambrian Defense is there to be on guard for Graboids. 🙂
Incog Neato (ghede) says:
“Clerk of the Clerk of Clerks”?
Better check the spelling, I think you did a Write-o.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
Clerk of the Clerk of “Clreks”?
“Doc-tor Tip is an en-e-my of the Cl-reks … De-fen-es-trate, de-fen-es-trate…” (Well, “destroy” was already taken…)
John Wells (johnwwells) says:
Hells yes?
HELLS yes?
…
(mellmellmellmellmell…)
Hardy Sharla (yllaria) says: I assume the Department of Redundancy Department is down the hall. I bet it has two doors.
Basil Jelly (basil_jelly) says:
Saw an “Office of Official Officers” in NYS’s Dept of Env. Cons. once.
I’ve always been sorry that I didn’t steal that sign.
Their job was appointing game wardens.
Basil Jelly (basil_jelly) says:
“I assume the Department of Redundancy Department is down the hall. I bet it has two doors.”
Yes, one mark “Enter” and the other marked “In”.
Brand Willis (brandyllyn) says: With as small as those creatures are (as I would assume Untiy and Sweetheart described them) – I wonder briefly what Tip plans on doing with that net.
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says: “Clerk of the Clerk of Clerks”?
Oh, yeah. I meant to fix that in Photoshop, and then I forgot.
Jeremy Berg (pisceneanteater) says:
1) I am currently doing battle with Illinois’ unemployment office. Their official name is Illinois Department of Employment Security. That’s right- IDES.
2) While Narbonic never did crossovers, and Skin Horse doesn’t seem likely to either, I still can’t shake the feeling that Gav Van Darin is behind that door.
Michael Taub (otakuloki) says: The question I have is: “Just who is being traumatized? Are the felines being traumatized? (In which case, I wonder if Leo has his new job, already.) Or are the felines being used to traumatize other beings? (Which might also be Leo’s new job. Maybe Leo alternates – traumatizer on even numbered days, and traumatized on odd numbered days?)”
Justin Grubbs (the_purple_knight) says:
Talking about Velociraptors, when I was in student congress I remember one bill that had to do with them. It involved cutting all militairy funding except to recreate killer velociraptors with teleporting armor. “They will be trained by a clone of Hitler to kill minorities with Nazi-like proficiency. Once we have a sufficient number, say seven, we will send them to guerilla camps in Panama to kill women and children. Any extra funding needed will be taken by taxing cripples and orphans extra heavily.”
I’ve still got it somewhere.
Nathan Walters (psychomarionette) says: Feline Trauma Project…I wonder if there are any kittens boiled in oil? Oh Sir Pounce, how we miss thee…
bzzzzd (bzzzzd) says: Daniel Ross (nentuaby) says: Velociraptors are the FAR, FAR future from a pre-cambrian viewpoint. Only toward the last bit of that era did multicellular life even evolve, and hard bits (shells only in that era, skeletons didn’t come until way later) only at the very tippy-top end. Life wouldn’t hit land for nonks.
Yeah, like you were there 😛
Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:
1) I first heard “Department of Redundancy Department” in college in 1978 or 79 from this guy: http://www.sdsc.edu/~jeff/Home.html. Anyone have a prior reference? If not, we can award him primacy.
2) Real Secret Government Doors (SGDs) have arcane project names (PNs). The four doors in the strip would be labeled MEN(OUT OF ORDER), ARCANETRAPPER, KITTYBOUNCE, and GAMMATOASTER.
3) We may pity Tip for having to do things that “normal” people never have to do, but the flip side is that Secret Government Jobs (SGJs) let you do things most people never get to do! Who hasn’t watched Torchwood or X-Files and said “Sign me up!”
Heh. Heh. Heh.
sharon (sharonopolis) says:
>[Tip’s an] Action Transvestite doubly so.
No, an *executive* transvestite!
>…doing battle with the Illinois Department of Employment Security.
>That’s right- IDES.
Well, hopefully you can get it wrapped up before the end of February… (groan)
Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says: Whoops. Stupid wikipedia and their chart of the Periods of Earth’s history going from newest to oldest…
Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says: Wait, I think I just got it. The cambrian explosion sure sounds like there may be a bomb involved. Very suspicious, better set something up to keep an eye on that.
Mel Van Weelden (kessalia) says: Man, how does one go about applying for jobs in these offices? *L* Precambrian Defense sound either way too fun or really boring but well paid. ;P Maybe the file-name story might say eventually.
Justin Grubbs (the_purple_knight) says:
Shaenon, would you please, please, please, tell us all what those door say? I am curious beyond all reason.
P.S. How many ways can an eyeball really melt?
James Rice (jhrice) says: Most days at my job aren’t all that special, but some days are just like that. I don’t melt eyes, but I do get to play with fire, and heavy machinery.
Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says:
Bureau of Precambrian Defense
Always gotta be on guard for those velociraptors.
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says:
The first one is “Clerk of the Clerk of Clerks,” the second is indeed “Bureau of Precambrian Defense,” and the last two are, I think, legible enough.
We have Jeffrey and his years in the civil service to thank for all of these excellent department names.
Daniel Ross (nentuaby) says: “Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says:
Bureau of Precambrian Defense
Always gotta be on guard for those velociraptors.”
Velociraptors are the FAR, FAR future from a pre-cambrian viewpoint. Only toward the last bit of that era did multicellular life even evolve, and hard bits (shells only in that era, skeletons didn’t come until way later) only at the very tippy-top end. Life wouldn’t hit land for nonks.
Owl Who says South (owlsayssouth) says:
yeah. Velociraptors indeed.
Obviously the Bureau of Precambrian Defense is there to be on guard for Graboids. 🙂
Incog Neato (ghede) says:
“Clerk of the Clerk of Clerks”?
Better check the spelling, I think you did a Write-o.
Ed Gedeon (eddurd) says:
Clerk of the Clerk of “Clreks”?
“Doc-tor Tip is an en-e-my of the Cl-reks … De-fen-es-trate, de-fen-es-trate…” (Well, “destroy” was already taken…)
John Wells (johnwwells) says:
Hells yes?
HELLS yes?
…
(mellmellmellmellmell…)
Hardy Sharla (yllaria) says: I assume the Department of Redundancy Department is down the hall. I bet it has two doors.
Basil Jelly (basil_jelly) says:
Saw an “Office of Official Officers” in NYS’s Dept of Env. Cons. once.
I’ve always been sorry that I didn’t steal that sign.
Their job was appointing game wardens.
Basil Jelly (basil_jelly) says:
“I assume the Department of Redundancy Department is down the hall. I bet it has two doors.”
Yes, one mark “Enter” and the other marked “In”.
Brand Willis (brandyllyn) says: With as small as those creatures are (as I would assume Untiy and Sweetheart described them) – I wonder briefly what Tip plans on doing with that net.
Shaenon Garrity (shaenongarrity) says: “Clerk of the Clerk of Clerks”?
Oh, yeah. I meant to fix that in Photoshop, and then I forgot.
Jeremy Berg (pisceneanteater) says:
1) I am currently doing battle with Illinois’ unemployment office. Their official name is Illinois Department of Employment Security. That’s right- IDES.
2) While Narbonic never did crossovers, and Skin Horse doesn’t seem likely to either, I still can’t shake the feeling that Gav Van Darin is behind that door.
Michael Taub (otakuloki) says: The question I have is: “Just who is being traumatized? Are the felines being traumatized? (In which case, I wonder if Leo has his new job, already.) Or are the felines being used to traumatize other beings? (Which might also be Leo’s new job. Maybe Leo alternates – traumatizer on even numbered days, and traumatized on odd numbered days?)”
Justin Grubbs (the_purple_knight) says:
Talking about Velociraptors, when I was in student congress I remember one bill that had to do with them. It involved cutting all militairy funding except to recreate killer velociraptors with teleporting armor. “They will be trained by a clone of Hitler to kill minorities with Nazi-like proficiency. Once we have a sufficient number, say seven, we will send them to guerilla camps in Panama to kill women and children. Any extra funding needed will be taken by taxing cripples and orphans extra heavily.”
I’ve still got it somewhere.
Nathan Walters (psychomarionette) says: Feline Trauma Project…I wonder if there are any kittens boiled in oil? Oh Sir Pounce, how we miss thee…
bzzzzd (bzzzzd) says:
Daniel Ross (nentuaby) says: Velociraptors are the FAR, FAR future from a pre-cambrian viewpoint. Only toward the last bit of that era did multicellular life even evolve, and hard bits (shells only in that era, skeletons didn’t come until way later) only at the very tippy-top end. Life wouldn’t hit land for nonks.
Yeah, like you were there 😛
Tiff Hudson (tiff_hudson) says:
1) I first heard “Department of Redundancy Department” in college in 1978 or 79 from this guy: http://www.sdsc.edu/~jeff/Home.html. Anyone have a prior reference? If not, we can award him primacy.
2) Real Secret Government Doors (SGDs) have arcane project names (PNs). The four doors in the strip would be labeled MEN(OUT OF ORDER), ARCANETRAPPER, KITTYBOUNCE, and GAMMATOASTER.
3) We may pity Tip for having to do things that “normal” people never have to do, but the flip side is that Secret Government Jobs (SGJs) let you do things most people never get to do! Who hasn’t watched Torchwood or X-Files and said “Sign me up!”
Heh. Heh. Heh.
sharon (sharonopolis) says:
>[Tip’s an] Action Transvestite doubly so.
No, an *executive* transvestite!
>…doing battle with the Illinois Department of Employment Security.
>That’s right- IDES.
Well, hopefully you can get it wrapped up before the end of February… (groan)
Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says: Whoops. Stupid wikipedia and their chart of the Periods of Earth’s history going from newest to oldest…
Thomas Levy (ergonomytch) says: Wait, I think I just got it. The cambrian explosion sure sounds like there may be a bomb involved. Very suspicious, better set something up to keep an eye on that.
Mel Van Weelden (kessalia) says: Man, how does one go about applying for jobs in these offices? *L* Precambrian Defense sound either way too fun or really boring but well paid. ;P Maybe the file-name story might say eventually.