“Well, well, well, look who’s here.
I haven’t seen you in many a year.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake,
baked a cake, baked a cake.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do, How-ja do.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a band,
grandest band in the land.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a band
and spread the welcome mat for you.
Now I don’t know where you came from
’cause I don’t know where you’ve been.
But it really doesn’t matter
grab a chair and fill your platter
and dig dig dig right in.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake,
hired a band, goodness sake.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do. How-ja do.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake,
baked a cake, baked a cake.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do, How-ja do.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a hall,
great big hall, band and all.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a hall
and spread the welcome mat for you.
Now I don’t know where you came from
’cause I don’t know where you’ve been.
But it really doesn’t matter
grab a chair and fill your platter
and dig dig dig right in.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve kept the pot,
coffee pot nice and hot.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do. How-ja do.”
—“If I Knew You Were Comin’ I’d’ve Baked a Cake,” Al Hoffman, Bob Merrill, and Clem Watts. I can’t top these lyrics, so look at ’em while I think of something else.
“If we knew you were coming, we would run and hide, run and hide, run and hide
There’s not much hope when Unity’s inside!
We’re all doomed, we’re all doomed, we’re all doomed!”
Yeah, that was a pretty clever gag, the agents already know their coming but instead of setting up an ambush they bake them a cake and hold a surprise party.
It reminds me why I’ve kept reading this all these years despite the times Sweetheart fails to be funny. This isn’t just yet another “clever and funny” webcomic where fully sentient zombies feed on their living human counterparts simply because zombies humans eating living humans is considered a thing, that’s just corny and cheesy.
Agreed in general, although I will say that if one has (or has ever had) a dog, Sweetheart is actually pretty funny at times. (Most dogs are protocol freaks. I think the comic has done a great job of portraying what uplifted, self-aware dogs might be like. And every one of Sweetheart’s pack has had a unique, yet still dog-like personality. I suspect David Brin would be proud.)
I think, on reflection, that’s one of the things that makes this comic great – there is a character for everyone. My personal favorite is Unity, and least favorite is Tip, although I’m pleased to see that Tip appears to be on the road to personal growth now.
I would’a thought, what with the “hang in there” poster and the dancing flower, that they might be HR…
Depending on how paranoid you are, those two options are not mutually exclusive.
Oooooh, I get it, we thought that this was the scenario where they thought that they were someone else, Jeff and Shaenon really got me there.
“Well, well, well, look who’s here.
I haven’t seen you in many a year.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake,
baked a cake, baked a cake.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do, How-ja do.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a band,
grandest band in the land.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a band
and spread the welcome mat for you.
Now I don’t know where you came from
’cause I don’t know where you’ve been.
But it really doesn’t matter
grab a chair and fill your platter
and dig dig dig right in.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake,
hired a band, goodness sake.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do. How-ja do.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake,
baked a cake, baked a cake.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do, How-ja do.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a hall,
great big hall, band and all.
Had you dropped me a letter I’d ‘ve hired a hall
and spread the welcome mat for you.
Now I don’t know where you came from
’cause I don’t know where you’ve been.
But it really doesn’t matter
grab a chair and fill your platter
and dig dig dig right in.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve kept the pot,
coffee pot nice and hot.
If I knew you were comin’ I’d ‘ve baked a cake.
How-ja do. How-ja do. How-ja do.”
—“If I Knew You Were Comin’ I’d’ve Baked a Cake,” Al Hoffman, Bob Merrill, and Clem Watts. I can’t top these lyrics, so look at ’em while I think of something else.
Or better yet try this:
“If we knew you were coming, we would run and hide, run and hide, run and hide
There’s not much hope when Unity’s inside!
We’re all doomed, we’re all doomed, we’re all doomed!”
Tip: “Is it a friendly cake?”
Friendly or unfriendly, Unity has neutralized it.
Hard to imagine the foretold squeegee incident will top this, but if anyone can do it Shaenon and Jeff can.
Have you forgotten already the lesson of the Razor Monkeys?
It was surprisingly pleasant.
And we all know Unity ate the candle as well.
Tomorrow, we see the smoke coming out of her ears (and stitches).
Ah, so they are *friendly* surveillance experts! ^_^
Must be a microwave cake. Otherwise it took them a really long time to make their way in there.
As Alton says on Cutthroat Kitchen, you MUST know how to make a microwave cake if you have any hope of success.
We don’t know how far back they saw them coming. We also don’t know how far away Annex One is parked.
I can do a cake in under an hour if I don’t wait for it to cool before applying the icing.
Yeah, that was a pretty clever gag, the agents already know their coming but instead of setting up an ambush they bake them a cake and hold a surprise party.
It reminds me why I’ve kept reading this all these years despite the times Sweetheart fails to be funny. This isn’t just yet another “clever and funny” webcomic where fully sentient zombies feed on their living human counterparts simply because zombies humans eating living humans is considered a thing, that’s just corny and cheesy.
“Halt! Friend or foe?” “Out of my way or I’ll run you down!” “Pass, friend!”
Margaret did have a way with words.
Agreed in general, although I will say that if one has (or has ever had) a dog, Sweetheart is actually pretty funny at times. (Most dogs are protocol freaks. I think the comic has done a great job of portraying what uplifted, self-aware dogs might be like. And every one of Sweetheart’s pack has had a unique, yet still dog-like personality. I suspect David Brin would be proud.)
I think, on reflection, that’s one of the things that makes this comic great – there is a character for everyone. My personal favorite is Unity, and least favorite is Tip, although I’m pleased to see that Tip appears to be on the road to personal growth now.