Skin Horse

By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
Color by Pancha Diaz
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2013-07-26
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2013-07-26

by shaenon on July 26, 2013 at 12:00 am
Chapter: My House Is Me
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Discussion (47) ¬

  1. Hugin
    July 26, 2013, 12:12 am | # | Reply

    The Brony metaphor might be a BIT heavyhanded here, guys. Maybe dial it back.

    • pcj
      July 26, 2013, 1:06 am | # | Reply

      The Brony metaphor? That if you are a magic corporate pony “magic corporate pony/unicorn” who hates bronies, life is hard?
      Reminds me of that old Groucho Marx joke – “I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.” 🙂
      The poor little pony!

    • Jeffrey Wells
      July 26, 2013, 8:21 am | # | Reply

      I know how it looks, Hugin, but this storyline has much more to do with a certain co-author’s girly artistic predilections that significantly predate the whole “Friendship is Magic” thing. I was reading Tinkerbell books well before any of that jazz came along. The fact that there’s a unicorn in this scene is an honest coincidence.

      • Kanta
        June 24, 2016, 4:13 am | # | Reply

        Plus, Narbonic had a My Little Pony joke before Friendship Is Magic came out, so we know Shaenon was at least aware of the older versions.

    • Foxhack
      July 26, 2013, 8:49 am | # | Reply

      As someone who usually doesn’t like the more… vocal bronies, this thing didn’t even set off my brony alarm.

      You’re seeing stuff that isn’t there.

      • Flakes
        July 26, 2013, 12:01 pm | # | Reply

        Unless Hugin is talking about Nick, because Nick would totally be a brony if he wasn’t trying to maintain his 1337M45T3R persona

      • Dorcus
        July 26, 2013, 1:13 pm | # | Reply

        Brony attention whores are still rarer and less hair-trigger than brony haters.

        “Lifestylers” of any stripe are annoying, but the “antis” are the ones with a crusade.

        Lifestyler: noun, def.: someone afflicted with an obsessive-compulsive fixation that dominates all their conversations to the annoyance of their friends and acquaintances.

    • mnementh
      July 27, 2013, 12:28 am | # | Reply

      Welcome to the Herd, Hugin. :p

      Seriously… this is ALL so 60s Disney treacly sweet it makes me want to barf Skittles, but if there’s one thing it AIN’T would be PC, which MLP totes is, even when it’s ragging on the whole PC thang subtextually.

      mnem
      Speaking as another mythical creature of the time before time I’ll tell you; someone leaves a maiden fair lying around under a tree near my cave, it ain’t my head I’m gonna put in her lap…

      • Altarboy
        July 27, 2013, 2:36 am | # | Reply

        Mythical? I’ve always believed in you mnementh.

  2. Becky
    July 26, 2013, 1:02 am | # | Reply

    Brony metaphor? I thought unicorns were pretty phallic with the whole horn thing and loving virgins. Though, with that in mind, probably why Nick gets along with him so well, besides the troll’n tude and mad gaming skillz.

  3. Klyfix
    July 26, 2013, 1:56 am | # | Reply

    I’m suddenly seeing Nick having to do Manly Things when this is all over in order to regain his, umm, feelings of Manliness.

    • Moor
      July 26, 2013, 2:26 am | # | Reply

      Aw, I hope not. I hope Nick comes to the realization that you don’t have to be “Manly” and all, and doesn’t try to go to such lengths and accepts himself as a male Jewish transgenic (Would that fall under the trans* umbrella? Would that even fall under the queer umbrella?) helicopter with a feminine-bodied drone.
      I wonder if this experience will cause him to identify further with the drone — maybe even considering it part of his body as opposed to something he drives. (I think that’s how he considers it now. I should probably reread the stuff he wrote on his blog.)

      • TheSexyMenhir
        July 26, 2013, 2:50 am | # | Reply

        I’m betting on the “guilty pleasure” ending, where he says something like “NEVER AGAIN!” only to then do something princessy when he thinks nobody is looking.

      • polerin
        July 26, 2013, 10:49 am | # | Reply

        no. No it would not fall under the trans * umbrella. People honestly try to assert it, and it only ends up making it worse for trans people 😛

        • CameoAppearance
          July 27, 2013, 6:25 am | # | Reply

          In-universe, obviously. In our world it’d be a farcical assertion, but our world doesn’t give people the option of transforming into sapient helicopters.

          • Jeff K!
            July 28, 2013, 3:32 am | #

            That you know of.

        • JET73L
          March 3, 2015, 10:25 pm | # | Reply

          As a transperson (by which I mean MtF, not ???tHuman), I have repeatedly disagreed with you. Sometimes I didn’t bother answering because I didn’t have anything to add but dissent, sometimes I didn’t answer because the “talking for everyone, not just yourself” thing you sometimes seem to do from my perspective made me too irritated to make a peaceful comment. I am now responding. While I very much do not see Nick as male-to-female transgender (he’s still very much masculine-gendered even though his, as he put it, “backup body” is designed to imitate the female form), I DO see him as human-to-helicopter trans-species, and I think almost* everything about is was very well-handled by the authors as one of the best allegories I’ve seen.

          *It’s unclear how far the homunculus program went before it crashed, so I don’t know if the “it feels right” thing was a result of his nature or his incomplete reprogramming. I would guess the former since it hasn’t since been brought up and he mentioned enjoying hours upon hours of flight sims before he knew his brain had been removed, but I’d still like to get a clear answer from Jeff (in the narrative or as a commentary/comment) before settling it in my mind.

      • jdreyfuss
        July 26, 2013, 10:56 am | # | Reply

        If you think Nick only drives the osprey, then you don’t understand Nick’s character. In fact, if you think what Nick drives is just a helicopter, then you don’t understand Nick’s character.

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/V-22_Osprey

        • Tetra Valent
          July 26, 2013, 5:47 pm | # | Reply

          Moor was referring to the drone – not the Osprey – as something that Nick only drives (at the moment).

    • Daibhid C
      July 26, 2013, 7:27 am | # | Reply

      How “manly” has Nick ever seen himself? Dude self-identifies as a helicopter and didn’t have any problem with operating a female body until people started forcing Wimsey’s stereotyped and trite definition of femininity on it.

      • Daibhid C
        July 26, 2013, 4:57 pm | # | Reply

        Just noticed my spelling error there; should be “Whimsey” as in “whimsical”, not “Wimsey” as in “Lord Peter”.

  4. Dave
    July 26, 2013, 2:23 am | # | Reply

    Time for a Nick rampage! Dude’s gonna go blow some SKIP up!

  5. BMunro
    July 26, 2013, 2:42 am | # | Reply

    Kick his little furry ass, Nick!

  6. Salty
    July 26, 2013, 2:51 am | # | Reply

    Hey. Hey.

    Major General or shut up, little mister sparklecorn.

  7. =Tamar
    July 26, 2013, 2:59 am | # | Reply

    That genderless unicorn needs a phallic symbol because it’s the only phallus-like thing it has.

    • JET73L
      March 3, 2015, 10:27 pm | # | Reply

      Well, sexless unicorn, anyway. Baron Mistycorn seems to have masculine gender pouring from its nonexistent wazoo.

  8. Eddurd
    July 26, 2013, 5:37 am | # | Reply

    (TUNE: “I Am A Pirate King”, Gilbert & Sullivan)

    Oh, once my life was tame and lame,
    Playing an e-lec-tron-ic game …
    But that all changed, before I knew,
    I was an Osprey V-22!
    And now it seems I’ve got to try
    To learn to be a girly guy …
    The Whimsy creatures all are screwed,
    If I can’t be a Princess dude!

     [REFRAIN:]
      For I am a Princess dude!
      And I’ll take a break from being rude
      To be a Princess dude!

      Yes, I am a Princess dude!
     [full team joins in]
      He is! What up for the Princess dude!
      And the unicorn is being rude
      To dis the Princess dude!
      Shut up!
      You’re rockin’ the Princess dude!
      You’re rockin’ the Prin-cess, dude!

    I find my mind I can install
    Inside this walking Barbie doll,
    The birds and beasts are treating me
    As if I’m cartoon royalty!
    With teammates making sure I’ve got
    The skills that can advance the plot,
    I’ll lose the slacker attitude
    And learn to be a Princess dude!
     [repeat REFRAIN]

    • Andrew
      July 26, 2013, 12:27 pm | # | Reply

      Bravo! Bravoissimo! And for the record, unicorns are just perv in Kawai clothing.

    • mittfh
      July 26, 2013, 3:30 pm | # | Reply

      Brilliant! Your G&S parodies are brilliant – especially those from Pirates 🙂

  9. drbrain
    July 26, 2013, 6:24 am | # | Reply

    misogyny lessons, anyway.

  10. Sean K.
    July 26, 2013, 7:17 am | # | Reply

    Well, what do you expect from someone who drinks Ellman’s Beer? 🙂

  11. soft
    July 26, 2013, 8:30 am | # | Reply

    Oh, hey look. The drone can blush.

    Poor Nick….

  12. Maki P
    July 26, 2013, 9:48 am | # | Reply

    Okay, I like him when he was just hardcore. But now he’s straight up misogynistic? Fuck that stupid Unicorn, vaginas are power.

    • Yotz
      July 26, 2013, 10:39 pm | # | Reply

      Watts are power. Vaginas are organs.

      • stopdropreload
        July 27, 2013, 1:34 pm | # | Reply

        Muscles, actually. Orifices too. Not organs.

        • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
          January 26, 2014, 5:34 am | # | Reply

          And muscles are power.

      • hopsa
        July 27, 2013, 3:53 pm | # | Reply

        And Nick has plenty of watts. 2 times 4,470 kilowatts.
        Anyway, ships and airplanes are ‘she’, what are helicopters?
        And if helicopters are male, is an osprey a hermaphrodite?

        • WJS
          July 9, 2019, 11:10 am | # | Reply

          I’m pretty sure that vehicles in general are “she”, although the tradition is strongest with ships. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a vehicle ever being called “he”, it seems to be “she” or “it”.

  13. Dorcus
    July 26, 2013, 9:50 am | # | Reply

    Real men don’t want to wear dresses. But they aren’t AFRAID of anything, INCLUDING wearing a dress if that’s what it takes.

    • =Tamar
      July 26, 2013, 10:02 am | # | Reply

      Of course, real men did and do wear Scottish kilts, Greek soldier dress uniforms, oriental robes, traditional coronation robes of all nations, priestly garments, Old Testament and New Testament Biblically-prescribed men’s clothing, Polynesian sarongs, etc.

      • Dewy
        July 26, 2013, 10:25 am | # | Reply

        However, those are not “dresses.” A dress, in modern, western culture denotes a female garment. I’m sure there were specific female garments in each of those other cultures you mention that “real men” did not wear and would have been ostracized if found wearing them.

        What I want to know is how have we not seen Tip having to kick some redneck or Jersey douchebag’s ass yet? The SK universe is a lot more tolerant than the one I live in, that’s for sure.

        • Anders P
          July 26, 2013, 5:11 pm | # | Reply

          Well, any dudebro aiming to teach Tip a lesson would 1) have to get past the ladies who flock to him and 2) end up in a world of hurt from the badass ex-army dude.

          It’s easy to forget that Tip, does, in fact, know how to kick ass.

        • =Tamar
          July 26, 2013, 8:54 pm | # | Reply

          Male Military: full _dress_ uniform.
          Also look at 15th century European houppelandes, genuinely unisex.

          • WJS
            July 9, 2019, 11:16 am | #

            Ooh, it has the word “dress” in it! That means it’s a dress! Except of course that’s bullshit, dress uniforms are not dresses. I really hope you’re just being obstinate and aren’t really that stupid.

  14. Ziggerung the Omnipatient
    July 29, 2013, 2:51 am | # | Reply

    He’s right. Unicorns would only lay their heads down on the laps of virgins after all.

    • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
      January 26, 2014, 5:33 am | # | Reply

      And fall asleep after getting their horn stroked by her (and the writers failed to specify *which* horn).

      Its less “the horn is a phallic symbol” and more “the entire unicorn legend is one long sexual metaphor”.

      • Sailorleo
        February 27, 2017, 6:12 am | # | Reply

        Except that they weren’t. Traditional unicorns were xenophobically violent to everything (and also goats, not horses). They became associated with (specifically female) virgins because they, being “obviously defensless”, were the last thing around them that they bothered to gore to death.

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