Tip can’t get that job because he is overqualified. Such is the paradox of the practice of hiring. They typically want a 20 to 25 year old with thirty years of experience in a field of work that was only invented 10 years ago.
A particular wonder of software development is you occasionally hear stories of IT professionals being unable to apply for a position requiring 10 years of experience in a technology that they created 3 years ago
Got the same story from a friends working in opera lighting who got hired because he is so taciturn that when he speaks he makes an Eastwood: you don’t dare to contradict him.
“Do you know how to work this light console?
-Yep.
-Oh. How much experience do you got with this brand new model?
-Ten.
-Oh. Ten years. Impressive. Uh I’m gonna check but unless I got some Brando in the rest of the interviewees, you’re hired.”
It’s a little known fact that the real reason they got rid of Hoffa was his being an eldritch abomination. They hold him now, but when the stars are right he will break free, and all the world will flame with bloody labor day celebrations.
I wrote a story once where he got kidnapped by aliens, along with the guy who was supposed to whack him. So they ended up whacking the aliens instead, starting a galaxy wide revolt. Story ends with the assassin bringing back the bones of Hoffa, so that the hero of the Revolution can be buried… on the fifty yard line of Giants stadium, because that way he could catch all the games.
“How long have you worn dresses?”
“Ever since…!”
“We only have you on record from the moment you stepped in through the door”
“Oh right yes since… that point, yes”
But it’s still not right to not do a good deed simply because you assume (even if you’re correct) that it will amount to nothing in the end. Save him now, because it’s the right thing to do. If he wants to throw himself to the lions later – or the leopards, whatever – that’s all on him.
To see them, Tip’s granted a clearance. They’re dream jobs for him, in appearance. They’re open to all, but insiders have call. It’s a tribute to Tip’s perseverance.
“According to the New York Times, landfill worker Frank Cappola, who died in March 2020, told a friend that his father had confessed to him that he had been ordered by a gang of unidentified men to bury Hoffa’s body underground in a steel drum.”
Is that the lead you’re referring to? Yes, there have been several stories about it in the last couple days, but the “lead” actually came out last summer.
Yeah, his story’s believable. Almost. I’ll believe it if they actually find him.
So how’s that story go?…
“Okay, so like my friend (who’s dead) told me on his death bed that his dad (who’s also dead) once claimed to have buried Hoffa’s body. I mean, they’re both dead now, so you can’t verify my story or anything, but trust me on this.”
“So your friend’s dad’s been dead for 13 years. Why didn’t your friend mention this years ago? There’s a pretty sizeable reward.”
“Oh, um… he wasn’t interested in the money.”
“Sure, whatever. And you? You’re not just a wee bit obsessed?”
“Of course I’m not obsessed! Just because I’ve written a half dozen books about Hoffa doesn’t mean I’m obsessed!”
“Well, we have to follow up on any such ‘leads’. But as you well know, if we don’t find him, not only do you not see a dime of that reward, but we also make you a laughing stock. In the meantime, enjoy this suspenseful musical interlude…”
Cuz I’m thinking that if said “unidentified men” had really brought Hoffa’s body to be buried, they would have already had him sealed in said steel drum, and they wouldn’t have told the guy what was in the drum. They would have just said “Here. Bury this. Deep. Don’t ask any questions, and we won’t bury you next to it.”
I’m a little dubious—why would anyone want to keep Hoffa’s body as a kind of trophy, especially if he had to explain why he had it someday?—but, hey, it’s as good a lead as any other. “I’m sure Mr. Hoffa will always be a cornerstone in our organization.”
…Dagnabbit, the most obvious thing to yell would also be hideously inappropriate. So instead let’s go with, “DANGER! DANGER, TIP WILKIN-SON!”
Gonna channel Fury Road instead of Return of the Jedi, here.
That’s bait.
Actually, that was “Lost in Space!” (original TV series)
Tip can’t get that job because he is overqualified. Such is the paradox of the practice of hiring. They typically want a 20 to 25 year old with thirty years of experience in a field of work that was only invented 10 years ago.
A particular wonder of software development is you occasionally hear stories of IT professionals being unable to apply for a position requiring 10 years of experience in a technology that they created 3 years ago
Got the same story from a friends working in opera lighting who got hired because he is so taciturn that when he speaks he makes an Eastwood: you don’t dare to contradict him.
“Do you know how to work this light console?
-Yep.
-Oh. How much experience do you got with this brand new model?
-Ten.
-Oh. Ten years. Impressive. Uh I’m gonna check but unless I got some Brando in the rest of the interviewees, you’re hired.”
Mr. Bryant seems to have ceased glowing… I wonder if that’s significant
Hmmm, could this be enough to corrupt Tip? Tune in next time to find out…
I truly hope Mr. Bryant’s next comment is “Besides, you wouldn’t want that job. The First Ladies are constantly demanding makeovers!”
Now I hope he does say that. The explosion (either literal or metaphorical) would be amazing to see.
It’s a little known fact that the real reason they got rid of Hoffa was his being an eldritch abomination. They hold him now, but when the stars are right he will break free, and all the world will flame with bloody labor day celebrations.
Please consider yourself upvoted.
+1
May or September?
Both
I wrote a story once where he got kidnapped by aliens, along with the guy who was supposed to whack him. So they ended up whacking the aliens instead, starting a galaxy wide revolt. Story ends with the assassin bringing back the bones of Hoffa, so that the hero of the Revolution can be buried… on the fifty yard line of Giants stadium, because that way he could catch all the games.
Sounds great! I love classic “Humanity uber alles!” space opera!
I just wanted to remind you that I love Skin Horse and I truly appreciate you for all your hard work. Thank you.
+1
Amen.
Eyup.
I think she knows I love it, but just in case: Shaenon, you are the best <3
Aw…thank you.
Same!
Remember you’ve got to qualify for these jobs. Seniority will get you in, but it won’t keep you there.
“How long have you worn dresses?”
“Ever since…!”
“We only have you on record from the moment you stepped in through the door”
“Oh right yes since… that point, yes”
Waiting for someone to swoop in and save Tip from almost certain temptation. This situation is far too perilous.
Can’t Tip have just a little peril?
PLEEZE?!!!
I WANT to face the peril!
Is there a job on that board to audition for certain Temptations? Can Tip do the dance steps?
He could at least be wearing a gorgeous ball gown while be swooped away!
If someone saves him from peril, he’ll just deliberately get himself thrown into the Gorge of Eternal Peril later. Not worth it.
But it’s still not right to not do a good deed simply because you assume (even if you’re correct) that it will amount to nothing in the end. Save him now, because it’s the right thing to do. If he wants to throw himself to the lions later – or the leopards, whatever – that’s all on him.
Unless not saving him now would be funny.
Is this like the Castle Anthrax in Monty Python’s Holy Grail? Get me some temptation, too!
Tempt him with a job he’ll love too much to want to risk losing by carrying out his original mission? Devious!
To see them, Tip’s granted a clearance. They’re dream jobs for him, in appearance. They’re open to all, but insiders have call. It’s a tribute to Tip’s perseverance.
How did you know there would be a lead on Hoffa’s body pretty much the day this strip ran? You’re creeping me out.
“According to the New York Times, landfill worker Frank Cappola, who died in March 2020, told a friend that his father had confessed to him that he had been ordered by a gang of unidentified men to bury Hoffa’s body underground in a steel drum.”
Is that the lead you’re referring to? Yes, there have been several stories about it in the last couple days, but the “lead” actually came out last summer.
Yeah, his story’s believable. Almost. I’ll believe it if they actually find him.
So how’s that story go?…
“Okay, so like my friend (who’s dead) told me on his death bed that his dad (who’s also dead) once claimed to have buried Hoffa’s body. I mean, they’re both dead now, so you can’t verify my story or anything, but trust me on this.”
“So your friend’s dad’s been dead for 13 years. Why didn’t your friend mention this years ago? There’s a pretty sizeable reward.”
“Oh, um… he wasn’t interested in the money.”
“Sure, whatever. And you? You’re not just a wee bit obsessed?”
“Of course I’m not obsessed! Just because I’ve written a half dozen books about Hoffa doesn’t mean I’m obsessed!”
“Well, we have to follow up on any such ‘leads’. But as you well know, if we don’t find him, not only do you not see a dime of that reward, but we also make you a laughing stock. In the meantime, enjoy this suspenseful musical interlude…”
Cuz I’m thinking that if said “unidentified men” had really brought Hoffa’s body to be buried, they would have already had him sealed in said steel drum, and they wouldn’t have told the guy what was in the drum. They would have just said “Here. Bury this. Deep. Don’t ask any questions, and we won’t bury you next to it.”
I’m a little dubious—why would anyone want to keep Hoffa’s body as a kind of trophy, especially if he had to explain why he had it someday?—but, hey, it’s as good a lead as any other. “I’m sure Mr. Hoffa will always be a cornerstone in our organization.”
It’s perfect! TOO perfect.