I’ve never understood this trope. No matter how physically attractive someone may be, I have absolutely zero desire to be intimate with them if I dislike them as a person. I get the sense I’m in the minority on that, but boy does that feel weird.
Actually no, that skirts the definition for demisexual– a lack of sexual desire for those whom one does not already feel a strong sense of connection and liking for. And I totally agree with you, to me it’s pretty weird also.
I’m with you! But I learned a long time ago that other people don’t think the same way I do and that I had better get used to it. I guess this is where the friendly concept kicks in. @_@
That seems to be the distinction between people who make love and people who simply have sex. If the sex is all they care about, then all that would be necessary is the physical attraction. But to make love, there has to be some emotional connection. And I’m with you. I could never be intimate with someone I dislike.
In a sense, I think the trope goes the other way. The character feels attraction towards someone that they have reasons to dislike/resent (in this case, Sweetheart thinks Remy is a rival for Unity and also voodoo does not agree with her orderly canine mind) and so sublimates the attraction into hatred/dislike.
It’s not “I dislike this person but I also find them attractive so I’m conflicted,” but “I am in the habit of disliking this person and also think they’re attractive so I hate them even more”, or “I am in the habit of disliking this person but I’ve also started liking them and am in denial about it so I’m exaggerating my dislike.”
Unity has no real reason to dislike Remy. He’s nice, kind, and has been a constant ally. Sure, he does weird voodoo, but it mostly works so ? But she seems to be afraid that Unity will like him for all the reasons she thinks he’s a good/nice person, so GRR Attractive Human!
You’re describing Sweetheart’s attitude towards Remy. I believe D. Walker was referring to the “hate-kissing” that Remy mentioned. They’re separate concepts.
And incidentally, shouldn’t the first word in your last paragraph be Sweetheart, not Unity?
“I’m attracted to this person and I’m not comfortable with it, so I shall heap scorn upon them” is how I picture it. Not my scene either, I’m quite comfortable with my attractions.
This idea, kismesissitude, gets alot of screen time in homestuck. The logic goes that a romantic feeling can arise from ‘hatred’ born from envy that forces you to self actualize. In the case of sweet heart it maybe his acceptance of the spiritual or his ability to be responsible without being overbearing.
Your response to my comment yesterday reminded me of the polaris pistol packin packrat, anyone here happen to know, remember who I’m talking about? Just curious if there’s anymore fans out there.
Huh. I thought Sweetheart disliked him because he was competition for Unity’s attention, but those comments about his hair and voice make me a bit uncertain. (Unity, after all, is more likely to want him for his brains, heh heh heh).
Well, I thought it might be working up to a Sam-and-Diane moment. So long as it stops at a kiss, because my stomach isn’t strong enough to see anything more…
She does see him as competition for Unity (even though he really isn’t), and she dislikes him for it. Everything about him that she doesn’t find dislikable – such as his hair and his voice – turns into contempt.
Intriguing theory, and the kind of twist the Authors are fond of. Although Sweetheart might notice physical evidence of such (goo on her muzle, bad taste in her mouth, etc.)
I think that Sweetheart’s jealous paranoia
Is pretty lame, is pretty lame.
I’m here with charms and rattles to employ on
The spirit plane, the spirit plane.
But I, I love to help departed souls in limbo
And set them free! And set them free!
And hang out with my friendly Skin-Horse bimbo.
That’s Unity! That’s Unity!
Listen, listen, where are all those toes?
Listen, listen, right now no one knows!
The voodoo me, the voodoo I, the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
Help is on the way, the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
I’m here because reports of nightmares waking
Transgenic cats, transgenic cats.
I’ve plumbed the spirit world stocktaking,
With bureaucrats, with bureaucrats.
Some force of evil on some toes it may be munching.
There’s not much time, there’s not much time.
Then, Unity’s solution is more punching,
Would that be fine? Would that be fine?
The voodoo me, the voodoo I, the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
I am here to say the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
—from “Funiculi, Finucula!” music by Luigi Denza, Italian lyrics by Peppino Turco. Traditional English lyrics by Edward Oxenford. Sung by…a tenor!
I’ve never understood this trope. No matter how physically attractive someone may be, I have absolutely zero desire to be intimate with them if I dislike them as a person. I get the sense I’m in the minority on that, but boy does that feel weird.
Actually no, that skirts the definition for demisexual– a lack of sexual desire for those whom one does not already feel a strong sense of connection and liking for. And I totally agree with you, to me it’s pretty weird also.
I’m with you! But I learned a long time ago that other people don’t think the same way I do and that I had better get used to it. I guess this is where the friendly concept kicks in. @_@
sigh. “friendly” should be ” frenemy”. There are days I swear my IPad is out to get me. >_>
That seems to be the distinction between people who make love and people who simply have sex. If the sex is all they care about, then all that would be necessary is the physical attraction. But to make love, there has to be some emotional connection. And I’m with you. I could never be intimate with someone I dislike.
In a sense, I think the trope goes the other way. The character feels attraction towards someone that they have reasons to dislike/resent (in this case, Sweetheart thinks Remy is a rival for Unity and also voodoo does not agree with her orderly canine mind) and so sublimates the attraction into hatred/dislike.
It’s not “I dislike this person but I also find them attractive so I’m conflicted,” but “I am in the habit of disliking this person and also think they’re attractive so I hate them even more”, or “I am in the habit of disliking this person but I’ve also started liking them and am in denial about it so I’m exaggerating my dislike.”
Unity has no real reason to dislike Remy. He’s nice, kind, and has been a constant ally. Sure, he does weird voodoo, but it mostly works so ? But she seems to be afraid that Unity will like him for all the reasons she thinks he’s a good/nice person, so GRR Attractive Human!
You’re describing Sweetheart’s attitude towards Remy. I believe D. Walker was referring to the “hate-kissing” that Remy mentioned. They’re separate concepts.
And incidentally, shouldn’t the first word in your last paragraph be Sweetheart, not Unity?
Yeah, it should — thanks! (alas, edit not a thing).
“I’m attracted to this person and I’m not comfortable with it, so I shall heap scorn upon them” is how I picture it. Not my scene either, I’m quite comfortable with my attractions.
The lady doth protest too much, yethinks?
This idea, kismesissitude, gets alot of screen time in homestuck. The logic goes that a romantic feeling can arise from ‘hatred’ born from envy that forces you to self actualize. In the case of sweet heart it maybe his acceptance of the spiritual or his ability to be responsible without being overbearing.
exhibit A) the punch line.
“her”, not his. Sweetheart is a bitch.
Oh, right, you meant Remy’s acceptance etc; apolotigies; pronoun trouble.
I think Unity’s comment in the 4th panel is now permanently burned into my brain. LOVE it.
So is that a mandrake on Remy’s shirt, or a mosquito?
I was thinking it was a fleur-de-lis…
Tenor?
As Dave once said to Caliban, “It’s kinda hard to tell in a comic strip.”
“Never trust a tenor!” —Anne McCaffrey.
Your response to my comment yesterday reminded me of the polaris pistol packin packrat, anyone here happen to know, remember who I’m talking about? Just curious if there’s anymore fans out there.
Who?
This pistol packin packrat, his mentors were Smith and Wesson, yes?
Yep, glad I’m not the only one.
Love that strip. Is it still up on their website? I haven’t read through it in a while.
The original website is closed. The strip in discussion is in the Internet Archive
I think it might be still up on Studio Foglio, I haven’t checked in a while.
Just a rephrasing of a popular song of the 1940s—which, I guess, is what Phil Foglio did, too. Missed that…missed plenty, I guess.
Huh. I thought Sweetheart disliked him because he was competition for Unity’s attention, but those comments about his hair and voice make me a bit uncertain. (Unity, after all, is more likely to want him for his brains, heh heh heh).
As to his reaction to Sweetheart, my thoughts immediately went here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq9hBEvFNlM
Well, I thought it might be working up to a Sam-and-Diane moment. So long as it stops at a kiss, because my stomach isn’t strong enough to see anything more…
It could easily be both. She’s jealous of his relationship with Unity at the same time she’s also conflicted about being attracted to him.
She does see him as competition for Unity (even though he really isn’t), and she dislikes him for it. Everything about him that she doesn’t find dislikable – such as his hair and his voice – turns into contempt.
Fascinating. I wonder if perhaps Sweetheart is already serving as host to a spirit? After all, we know she’s capable of carrying out the attacks…
Intriguing theory, and the kind of twist the Authors are fond of. Although Sweetheart might notice physical evidence of such (goo on her muzle, bad taste in her mouth, etc.)
I notice that Unity seems to have been taking on a Narrator role lately, and apparently addressing us directly.
I get the impression that she’s addressing the queen, and we are looking at them from the same direction that the queen is.
Unity does seem to break the 4th wall occasionally. I don’t recall which other characters do, but I think there have been a few other cases.
I think that Sweetheart’s jealous paranoia
Is pretty lame, is pretty lame.
I’m here with charms and rattles to employ on
The spirit plane, the spirit plane.
But I, I love to help departed souls in limbo
And set them free! And set them free!
And hang out with my friendly Skin-Horse bimbo.
That’s Unity! That’s Unity!
Listen, listen, where are all those toes?
Listen, listen, right now no one knows!
The voodoo me, the voodoo I, the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
Help is on the way, the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
I’m here because reports of nightmares waking
Transgenic cats, transgenic cats.
I’ve plumbed the spirit world stocktaking,
With bureaucrats, with bureaucrats.
Some force of evil on some toes it may be munching.
There’s not much time, there’s not much time.
Then, Unity’s solution is more punching,
Would that be fine? Would that be fine?
The voodoo me, the voodoo I, the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
I am here to say the voodoo me, the voodoo I!
—from “Funiculi, Finucula!” music by Luigi Denza, Italian lyrics by Peppino Turco. Traditional English lyrics by Edward Oxenford. Sung by…a tenor!
A tenor – but not Garrison Keillor?
Okay, after Sweetheart’s speech, I’m now picturing Remy as being played by Carlos from Welcome to Night Vale.