I thought that I had failed at dominating life …
I could not conquer people, only plants!
Then I went to Val-Mart,
Aced the interview!
Now I work in produce, aisle two …
Yes, I found my place!
Now I’m Melon-Cleaver!
They must face
My wrath, it’s not nice!
I’m the boss! (GRAAGH!)
I’m Melon-Cleaver,
Over-achiever!
Raise the price!
People who work at Val-Mart may be all weirdness-blind, but they certainly get customers who can see strangeness. (The weird too are often short on cash). Presumably they think Gorgoth is some sort of promotion.
Well, in one of our gaming sessions, Kenyan engineer/spy Kip Asuto got bored with hearing the younger guys assigning macho names to their guns, so with a level stare all around, he set his Swiss Army knife and his folding pliers tool on the table and said dryly, “I call these . . . Rosencrantz and Guildenstern.”
He’s found his niche!
It takes a special type of person to work the word “lest” into a conversation, let alone “cleft”.
Gorgoth is my kind of person.
Especially both in the same sentence!
Selling sliced halves at markup? He IS a product of evil science!
No, just very knowledgeable about modern marketing practices.
Would you mind filling us in on what Gorgoth’s nametag says?
Looks like “Assistant Manager” to me.
Gorgoth
The Dominator
Prince of All Life
I believe that the wrench should be names Hexcalibur.
not bad but I prefer Caledfwrench
I believe that the wrench should be named Hexcalibur, and that I should have proofread my previous comment more thoroughly.
I was gonna say Wrench is a perfectly awesome name, but now I’ve changed my mind. Hexcalibur, yes!
I dunno, I prefer the simplicity of “Wrenchie”.
Doctor Peter Wrenchman
Perhaps something less formal: Lefty Lucy.
Rite E. Tighty?
The melons go from $1.97 a pound in Panel One to $1.00 a pound in Panel Four. No wonder they’re conspiring against Gorgoth.
They just want to get away from Gorgoth.
Nightrender, render of night itself and cleaver of melons!
(TUNE: “I’m A Believer”, The Monkees)
I thought that I had failed at dominating life …
I could not conquer people, only plants!
Then I went to Val-Mart,
Aced the interview!
Now I work in produce, aisle two …
Yes, I found my place!
Now I’m Melon-Cleaver!
They must face
My wrath, it’s not nice!
I’m the boss! (GRAAGH!)
I’m Melon-Cleaver,
Over-achiever!
Raise the price!
Oh my God. The pun. Bad Ed! No cookie!
I don’t see a pun here, only rhymes.
Another fine filk, Eddurd, and my earworm for the day.
People who work at Val-Mart may be all weirdness-blind, but they certainly get customers who can see strangeness. (The weird too are often short on cash). Presumably they think Gorgoth is some sort of promotion.
It’s nice seeing someone who loves their work.
I shouldn’t be amazed that there are Narbonic themed songs on youtube.
A name for his wrench?
Well, in one of our gaming sessions, Kenyan engineer/spy Kip Asuto got bored with hearing the younger guys assigning macho names to their guns, so with a level stare all around, he set his Swiss Army knife and his folding pliers tool on the table and said dryly, “I call these . . . Rosencrantz and Guildenstern.”
Isn’t that bad luck? After all, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern … die. (otherwise a great name, though.)