Skin Horse

By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
By Shaenon K. Garrity & Jeffrey C. Wells
Color by Pancha Diaz
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2012-09-12
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2012-09-12

by shaenon on September 12, 2012 at 12:00 am
Chapter: Railway Children
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Discussion (38) ¬

  1. Amonduul
    September 12, 2012, 12:05 am | # | Reply

    Sigh. There’s always one in every genre-savvy place/group. Either they aren’t savvy at all, they’re savvy for the wrong genre, or they’re convinced that they’re friends are just being silly. It’s a shame.
    That said, I agree with Unity: I want to know what this guy’s end is going to be. Can we stay and watch, Shaenon & Jeff? Please?

  2. Anderson
    September 12, 2012, 12:08 am | # | Reply

    …This being the Narboniverse, he might just be the only survivor of what is to come.

    Probably not though.

  3. Manifesta
    September 12, 2012, 12:18 am | # | Reply

    Well, since his shirt is obviously red, I hope he’s wearing a nice Clan Wallace tartan to go with it. If not, Tip can do a makeover. Since Phillips is living fast and dying young, he can leave a good-looking corpse, too.

  4. alurker
    September 12, 2012, 12:27 am | # | Reply

    Yeah. I’ll be in the bunker. That much fate tempting’s gonna be a doozy.

  5. Towering Barbarian
    September 12, 2012, 1:11 am | # | Reply

    I do have a feeling he knows *precisely* what he is doing. The question is, what put him in a mood to End It All in the first place? That said, I’m with Anderson on this one – I’m pretty sure Fate will leave him alone as long as he’s that set on dying. It’s when he rediscovers the will to live that we’ll have to start worrying on his behalf. The odds of his surviving this in such an event are A Million To One! ^^;

    • Andrew
      September 12, 2012, 1:31 am | # | Reply

      He really is asking for it, isn’t he?

      • Anderson
        September 12, 2012, 2:05 am | # | Reply

        At least he’s not, say…the driver. Or a reactor technician. Either way, irony dictates either HE dies…or a lot of other people die but he survives, thereby ironically subverting the ironic death trope he would otherwise be playing in to. Unless Shaenon and Jeffrey WANT us to think he’ll live ironically, in which case they may subvert it again by killing him off AFTER we assume he’s ironically lived through the time period in which he could…..what am I saying again? Something like that.

        On the plus side for him, he’s got a name now. Albeit only a last name…which while it does count as minor plot armor, is still like walking into a high-power laser test lab wearing sunglasses to protect your eyes. It really doesn’t work out well. Still, this is a train of mad scientists who consider common sense and *not* tempting fate to be “cheating”, so he may have a chance.

        Also can I say, that is a NICE hat. He’d get bonus point if it had corks dangling from the brim, but it’s still a neat hat.

        • Dewy
          September 12, 2012, 6:44 am | # | Reply

          “Yeah, now it’s just pathos. So you’re dying in my lap and I’m all ‘Phillips! Phillips don’t you quit on us! Don’t you dare!!’ “

          • Rob, Arbiter of Reality
            September 12, 2012, 11:01 am | #

            Monarch Henchman #21 FTW!

          • JET73L
            July 23, 2018, 8:55 am | #

            Pathos? This is Skin Horse. Bathos and schadenfreude is our default. It’s only by the immense skill of Jeffrey and Shaenon that we can ever brake enough to dip into pathos.

        • Rob, Arbiter of Reality
          September 12, 2012, 8:56 am | # | Reply

          These are Mads we’re talking about. He could be the driver/pilot, reactor technician, and space fold navigator with a remote virtual interface to all three systems implanted in his head, and just be working the security checkpoint because he lost a bet at caber tossing on the rec deck.

        • Manifesta
          September 12, 2012, 12:04 pm | # | Reply

          If he had corks dangling from the hat, at least we’d know that his first name is Bruce.
          And if he’s in danger of losing that NICE hat, then this is a BAD PLAN! (I’m finally reading through the Girl Genius archive, after hearing so much about it here and at Narbonic for years. I see why everybody loves it so much.)

        • KT Leone
          September 12, 2012, 12:33 pm | # | Reply

          Truly you have a dizzying intellect.

    • Kellandros
      September 12, 2012, 6:39 am | # | Reply

      If it wasn’t for even the local cyborg angel’s reaction, I would wonder if this was part of his normal job?

      To protect for actual labs with volatile and dangerous things from going wrong, why not set up a good distance away a place for lightning and irony to strike?

    • Altarboy
      September 12, 2012, 12:08 pm | # | Reply

      Don’t ever tell me the odds.

      • JET73L
        February 20, 2015, 6:43 am | # | Reply

        1! 3! 5! 7! 13! 27! 99! 143!

  6. codebracker
    September 12, 2012, 1:37 am | # | Reply

    Wow I never expected unity of all people to get genre savvy, maybe it’s a side-effect from all those brains.

  7. Barking Monkey
    September 12, 2012, 3:20 am | # | Reply

    On the other hand, the kilt offers quite a bit of ironic protection. Unless he dies a kilt-related death.

    • Dewy
      September 12, 2012, 6:47 am | # | Reply

      Nah. If he get’s his ticket punched it will HAVE to be in some sort of limbo related way. Or beer related?

      What do beer, limbo and kilts have in common? I’m missing a reference here somewhere, I just know it.

    • Manifesta
      September 12, 2012, 11:57 am | # | Reply

      Eric Camden, Seventh Heaven: “I don’t want to die in a kilt.”

      • Manifesta
        September 12, 2012, 1:11 pm | # | Reply

        Correction—when he finds that that he’s dead and in heaven: “I really wish I hadn’t worn this kilt.”

  8. Eddurd
    September 12, 2012, 3:43 am | # | Reply

    (TUNE: “You’ll See”, Madonna)

    I’m slacking as I work Security!
    Hubris!
    I’m laughing at the risk and tempting Fate!
    I’m making you “limbo”
    To go beneath the gate!
    Hubris … is rea-lly great!

    I say that nothing bad will come to me!
    Hubris!
    My red shirt and my kilt show off my class!
    I’m weilding a prop sword,
    Declaring “None shall pass!”
    Hubris … can kiss … my @$$!

     Give me a break!
     You know this posting is a joke,
     Nothing comes near
     That I should worry or fear …
     Chances I’ll take …
     And when my butt goes up in smoke,
     Then you’ll know I
     Am just a victim of my …
     Hubris!

  9. nemryn
    September 12, 2012, 4:26 am | # | Reply

    The thing is, this trope is so well-known by now that dramatic irony demands he be safe.

    • abb3w
      September 12, 2012, 11:19 pm | # | Reply

      Specifically, locked in a safe.

  10. davidbreslin101
    September 12, 2012, 5:20 am | # | Reply

    On the other hand, the one thing that WON’T happen now is something sneaking invisibly through the checkpoint- that would only happen if he was super-keen and vigilant.
    He’s a dedicated man, to put security ahead of his own life like this.

  11. dexitroboper
    September 12, 2012, 7:19 am | # | Reply

    On the other hand he could end up as a perfectly safe penguin. There are precedents.

  12. Altarboy
    September 12, 2012, 12:10 pm | # | Reply

    Secure checkpoint Alpha:
    “We don’t just tempt fate, we taunt it”.

  13. Saberbeam
    September 12, 2012, 2:36 pm | # | Reply

    At least it’s not his last day on the job.

    • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
      January 23, 2014, 5:36 am | # | Reply

      Technically it is his last day on the job…

  14. Shadowmehr
    September 12, 2012, 3:53 pm | # | Reply

    Okay, let’s start a pool, every box represents an hour, I’m opening with dead and in at least five pieces in three hours (in-universe time). Any other takers?

  15. Anderson
    September 12, 2012, 5:52 pm | # | Reply

    He could be the lightning rod…. If I ever succeed with my goal to become the worlds first insane super-genius mad ecologist, I’m setting up a small complex 20km from the main base filled with people paid to tempt fate continuously while doing all the really-dangerous-on-a-local-scale work.

    • cwar
      September 13, 2012, 12:01 am | # | Reply

      that sounds very sane

    • JET73L
      July 23, 2018, 9:00 am | # | Reply

      You must NEVER, for so much as a SINGLE INSTANT, let it cross your mind that your precautions are sufficient. That in itself is tempting fate, and would have everything come crashing down upon you.

  16. Forzin
    September 12, 2012, 8:03 pm | # | Reply

    But by virtue of attempting to act as a lightning rod for irony, wouldn’t irony thus then strike everyone else BUT the lightning rod… ironically?

  17. Ogden Wernstrom
    September 12, 2012, 8:44 pm | # | Reply

    This sequence is gut-wrenching! It is one thing to see a security guard die painfully, but it is something else entirely to see them forsake their honor. I work for the finest security service in the world, where we make our own violence to keep our employees and the citizens they protect safe from the ravages of prolonged peace. If you can smuggle a weapon past a checkpoint’s second gate, you may kill the guard on duty and inherit their parking space (section Q-117-219-C). I do not mean to brag, but the alert level for the division picnic is V on a scale where a full alien invasion rates an IV.

  18. ysabet
    September 12, 2012, 10:08 pm | # | Reply

    Oh man, Murphy is giggling and digging out his SPECIAL toys for this one, isn’t he? If this guy ends up still mammalian I’ll be surprised.

  19. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
    January 23, 2014, 5:34 am | # | Reply

    Oh god, he’s tempting fate recursively. I really haven’t the faintest idea what a recursive ironic death would be, but the mere thought chills my bones.

    Or maybe its just that I’ve got a cold and am pretty sleep deprived right now. Wait… shit, I just said something to the effect of “its probably nothing”, didn’t I?

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